Where'd the Time Go?



This first year of marriage has just flown by! I can't believe tomorrow is our one year anniversary. In some ways it seems like it's gone by so fast, but in other ways last year feels like so long ago. Derek and I have learned so much together and grown so much together, it almost feels like I'm not quite the same person as I was a year ago. I guess in a way neither of us is quite the same - marriage has a way of maturing you, because you have to learn how to function as a unit with your spouse. It's the process of becoming one, I guess.

Of course this year has also held a lot of trials for Derek and me, and that has a way of maturing you as well. The Lord has taught us so much through our trials and through our good times this year. Here are a few of the things that I believe He has taught me through our first year of marriage.

1. Don't worry about money (or anything for that manner). Especially when there really isn't anything to worry about. Last year when Derek and I first got married we stressed a lot about our budget. Which was absolutely silly, because we had plenty of extra money! We soon learned how silly we were to worry when Derek resigned from his job for another job that fell through. They say the first year of marriage is the hardest, and that one of the most stressful things you can go through in life is a career change. And we had to deal with both at the same time!

Lesson One: Don't worry about things - the Lord might give you something to worry about to show you how silly you were to worry over nothing.

"Do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about its own things. Sufficient for the day is its own trouble." Matthew 6:34

2. How to rely on the Lord. We had to learn this one well. It was four months before Derek found another job (we all know about the market trouble last fall - not so great timing for that to happen), and another three months after that until I found a steady job situation. That's seven months of unsteady income and having to rely on the Lord to provide enough money for us to pay our bills each month. When you have to learn to just trust in the Lord and do the best you can each month it certainly strengthens your faith, because relying on the Lord is the only thing you can do. He pulled us through that hard time, and I think we came out with a stronger faith and a stronger marriage because of it.

Lesson Two: The Lord is certainly worthy of our trust; He always knows what He's doing.

"Commit your way to the Lord, trust also in Him, and He shall bring it to pass. He shall bring forth your righteousness as the light, and your justice as the noonday. Rest in the Lord, and wait patiently for Him." Psalm 37: 5-7a

"But the salvation of the righteous is from the Lord; He is their strength in the time of trouble. And the Lord shall help them and deliver them; He shall deliver them from the wicked and save them, because they trust in Him." Psalm 37:39-40

"Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and lean not on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him, and He shall direct your paths." Proverbs 3:5


3. I am a very selfish person. This is one thing that I feel like the Lord has especially been convicting me of over the past several months. On the other hand, my husband is a very unselfish person - he's always thinking of me first. I tend to think of myself first, then everyone else. That is not a godly attitude. It's not a loving attitude. I think marriage is sort of like a flashlight - it tends to shine a light on all of our flaws. Selfishness is the root of pretty much every sin, so I've been working on attacking the root. If I can work on my selfish tendencies, hopefully everything else will get better too. Selfishness will probably be a constant, lifetime sort of struggle, but I'm hoping to eventually improve with the Lord's help.

Lesson Three: Selfishness is one of those relationship killers, and the Lord certainly doesn't approve; selfishness should be nipped in the bud.

"Let nothing be done through selfish ambition or conceit, but in lowliness of mind let each esteem others better than himself. Let each of you look out not only for his own interests, but also for the interests of others." Philippians 2:3-4

4. How great our Lord's love and grace toward Derek and me (and everyone who believes in Him as well). The Lord has shown us so much love and grace through the various troubles we have faced this year. He took care of us through our months of unemployment. He helped us to make it through financially. He provided us with jobs that allow us to pay the bills. He taught us how to work together as a couple and grow stronger in our marriage, even with all the stress and conflict that financial difficulty brings. He showed us His faithfulness through countless every day problems and personal struggles. And He's always brought us through to the other side.

Lesson Four; The Lord is eternally faithful, even through the worst of trials, though we are so undeserving of His grace.

"For great is Your love, higher than the heavens; Your faithfulness reaches to the skies." Psalm 108:4

"But the mercy of the Lord is from everlasting to everlasting on those who fear Him . . ." Psalm 103:17


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Jenene said...

Happy First Anniversary to you guys! I think Art and I have learned all of those lessons as well. We're still learning the one about not worrying about money.

Are you guys doing anything special for your first anniversary? Ours is next week, and we have no clue how we want to celebrate!

Jessica said...

I loved reading this post...God sure does teach us a lot in the first year of marriage! And probably in all the other ones, too.

Happy Anniversary tomorrow!! :-D

Anonymous said...

Wonderful insight. We've learned a lot of the same lessons in our first year too. Happy anniversary to you two, and have fun celebrating your marriage!

Brittney Galloway said...

Happy Anniversary! I love the new look of the blog too!

Amber Hansen said...

Happy Anniversary, girl.

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