On The Age Gap (+Printable)

In case you haven't stopped to do the math, Gwendolyn and this new baby will be less than 16 months apart. I'm going to have three babies in 38 months!

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Thinking about the age difference has never bothered me or made me nervous.  Sure, things are going to be busy around here, but I think it will be happy, joyful chaos, and I love it.  I am so excited about this new baby!  I am so grateful for an easy conception.  I think it's perfect that my kids are all going to be so close together.

The only thing that bothered me at first was that I worried I was going to get negative reactions from some people.  The people who were going to ask "And how far are they going to be apart?" with an incredulous look on their faces.  The people who were going to shake their heads and tell me how crazy my life was going to get.  The people who were going to give me an odd look and say, "Wow, you're going to have your hands full".

When I thought about that in the beginning of my pregnancy, I didn't want those reactions, because I am thrilled about this baby.   The thought that other people might not share in my joy made me upset.

The first few times I told someone whose reaction I wasn't sure about, I tried to beat them to the punch so they couldn't say it first.  "It was a surprise!"  "They'll be pretty close, so it'll be a little crazy!"  With a smile on my face, trying to let them know that I was completely happy about this new blessing.

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Then I told one person who I was almost sure would have a negative reaction.  I was really nervous about it.  I said my line about it being a surprise, etc.  But she smiled and looked me right in the face and said "It's a blessing."  Immediately the pressure was off, and I grinned and said that it was and how happy we were.

I was so relieved that my announcement to her went well, but it got me thinking.  I do not have to explain this baby, as if he or she was an accident.  This baby is an absolute gift from God that He chose to give me at this precise time. 

I am so grateful and happy about this baby.  There is no reason for me to minimize that just because someone might give me snide words or a disapproving look.  If someone reacts that way, they are the ones who are wrong.  

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God creates life.  Those lives have a deep meaning and purpose, no matter how long or short they may be.  They are each precious and worthy of celebration.  There are no accidents.

I am no longer feeling the need to offer explanations for this baby before someone can react.  If they don't like it, they can take it up with God, but I am excited.  

I've also found the perfect response to the "Wow, you have your hands full" comment.  I saw a sign that said this shortly after I got pregnant, and I thought it was perfect.

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My hands might be full, but my heart will be even more full.  I wouldn't have it any other way.

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P.S.  I am happy to report that no one who knows me has given me any weird reactions.  Every one of you who knows me in blogland, as well as my real life family and friends, has been so sweet and excited for me!  I'm so grateful to have such a wonderful support system in my life.  The only weird reactions I've gotten have been from strangers.
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"B" said...

Babies are blessings and if you have one or twenty, each and everyone of them is exactly where they are supposed to be. His timing is perfect!

Felicia said...

I think that quote is perfect! And what a graceful response to strangers, too! They don't know your story and how happy you are to be surprised. I love your attitude about that aspect :)

Sarah said...

I dreaded these comments too and did end up getting the awkward comments numerous times, but you are right. You don't have to explain yourself or God's plan. Each child is a blessing! I came to that realization too, and life just got easier after that. Ha!

I so loved those people that would say something like, "My kids were all that close together and I wouldn't change it for the world!" It just gave me even more excitement.

So now you and I can be the encouraging moms for future families with kids close together because we know they'll need it to counter the negativity. :)

Taara said...

Our third pregnancy was also a bit of a surprise, and even more surprising to find out it was twins. We do get a little bit of the, "are you guys crazy?" As though we had a say in having twins or not! Children truly are a blessing, enjoy your pregnancy. :)

Amanda said...

While I'm happy my first two are now guaranteed to be at least a year and a half apart, I've been open to having a second at any time. I think their are pros and cons to any age difference. Friends of our have girls 14 months apart and they're potty training them at the same time!

Lauren said...

great quote! babies certainly are a blessing and God knows every moment of our lives--so why would we ever question the timing?!?

Whitney said...

So happy for your little blessing. We are so so ready for a #2, and with Carter just turning 1, I too am worried about the reaction that will come from others...but you are so right. I may have to come back and read this post when the time comes! :)

LeAnna said...

Yes, yes and YES! I say that full hands/full hearts line to everyone that throws that one at me. I have received the most negative/incredulous reactions from complete strangers, as opposed to friends/family/acquaintances. And as annoying as those strangers comments can be (I had one just yesterday that riled me up good) the short story is that it REALLY really REALLY doesn't matter what they say. At all. It doesn't matter what anyone says, but strangers? They get a few extra "really's" ;)

Kara @ Just1Step said...

Girl, I am SO happy for you. I theoretically would like my boys to be even closer than they are, but I just wasn't ready to have another baby until right around the time we conceived Greyden. Postpartum depression really hit me hard! After Greyden, though, without the depression, I could totally understand why people had babies one after another. They're awesome little blessings. :)

Natalie said...

Love this!! I don't know that I was ever really NERVOUS per say to tell people, but we got tons of comments about their spacing (17 months). Even now when I'm at the store or anywhere I always get at LEAST one person tell me my hands are full and I try to respond with something positive and something that sets me apart as a Christian...instead of 'Oh, I know, it's exhausting!" I try to say something like 'Yes, I do and I'm SO blessed!" :)

Rebecca Lobb said...

Never feel that you have to explain Callie. You have been given a beautiful family and should tell the world about it :)

Anonymous said...

*standing ovation*

HIS daughter said...

I love this! We got so many comments before we even got pregnant with our 2nd one that I was TERRIFIED to tell some people and while, their reaction was not as bad as I thought it would be, you are so right! Each baby is a blessing and I don't have to explain the baby to people! Thanks for sharing this really did encourage me! And it is good to know I am not the only mama out there that has these kinds of experiances! :)

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