Two Kids - Balancing Things At Home

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Before you ever even venture out of the house with two kids, your husband will go back to work.  And you will be left alone in the house.  With two little ones depending solely on you.

In the end, every mom who has ever had two kids figures this out, and you will too.  Here are just a few things I learned (so far) about taking care of more than one young child at once.


They will occasionally cry at the same time.  

You can sit down and cry too (don't think it hasn't happened before in my house), or you can buck up and handle it!  Don't let it freak you out when it happens.  

Obviously if one of your kids is crying because they are in danger or hurt, help them first!  Just thought I better say it.  

In non-injurious situations, take care of the kid whose fix is quicker first (i.e. - hand the bottle to the baby, or give your toddler a snack).  

If you are not sure why they are crying, take care of the toddler first.  They will remember, and you don't want them to feel like they are not as important as the new baby.

Don't worry too much about what to do with your oldest while you are nursing the baby.
Go ahead and make sure your toddler is taken care of first (i.e. - they don't have to go potty, they have a snack).  If your child knows how to play independently at all, they'll be fine.

There is no reason that you can't take a shower.  

Put the older one down in front of a video (it really is okay), put the younger one down in a bouncy chair/crib/pack-and-play, and there you go.  It's not being a bad mom to let other things entertain your kids while you take a five minute shower and blow dry your hair.  Really.  It's okay.

If at all possible, manipulate schedules so they nap at the same time! 

I think this is probably a lot easier for some families than others.  Thankfully I've been able to work this out with my kiddos from the start, and they've cooperated.  I try to push Gwen off until after lunch for her nap so that she and Wyatt go down at the same time.  Wyatt is fairly flexible on his nap time too, so that helps when Gwen gets tired early.  But even if it only works out for 30 minutes, that time alone can be so refreshing and give you energy for the rest of the day!  (It's also how I still manage to blog, in case you are wondering - we might have more of a challenge after this baby arrives.)

Take your opportunities to spend time with each child individually.  

Your love is not split with the second baby, it doubles.  Your attention, however, is a different story.  You will have to split your attention when both of the kids are awake.  Don't beat yourself up about that, because it's just the way it is, and it's good for kids to learn that they have to share.   But if you get some time ( for example, if one of them is still napping) do something with your child who is awake.  Every kid needs some one-on-one time with mom every now and then.


It seems really overwhelming when you only have one to think of handling two, but it's really not hard.  It's a balancing act, and it might take practice, but every mom eventually finds her mom-of-two groove.  Give yourself time, figure out what works best for you, and thank God for this precious time at home with your kiddos!
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"B" said...

All of these parenting two children are so beneficial as we (my husband and I) prepare to enter this next journey. I am excited and nervous. Nervous about how much I love my daughter and will it feel the same with number two and excited to get to enjoy another child and see the bonds of siblings! I love having siblings and hope my daughter does too!

Kara @ Just1Step said...

Good points, Callie. :) I love the shower comment most of all. I feel so gross and disgusting if I don't shower daily (I think part of that is due to the fact that my hair gets oily super fast), and so I squeeze in a shower every day. It always surprises me how many moms really struggle to find time to shower. As for my house, while I shower, sometimes Krew is in front of the TV, sometime Grey is crying in his crib, sometimes both boys are throwing toys around in the bathroom with me, sometimes they're playing in the bathtub while I shower (it's a separate bathtub that I can see through the glass shower doors)...but whatever the case, I find a way to make it happen, and sometimes they're not happy while I do it. But it's something I need to do for myself. :)

Kate Craig said...

Haha love this! My toddler loves to bring all her toys in the bathroom and talk to me if I take a bath while she's awake

Kate Craig said...

I agree with all of these! Especially taking care of the toddler first and that you CAN shower

Unknown said...

This is a great post! I don't need it yet but I know one day I will. hopefully sooner rather than later :)

Caroline @ In Due Time said...

I would love to hear how you make time to blog too! All great points!!! Thanks for sharing

Unknown said...

I love your list! It took me almost 10 months to get a schedule that included showering every day. And let me tell you, a shower everyday changes life (for the better!!).
Now I get to start over with 3 ;-)

Susannah said...

These are awesome tips!!! I hope I remember them when I have two kiddos!! :-)

Lauren said...

Love this post! I'm definitely coming back to this series once we have #2...which is hopefully sooner rather than later! ha!

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