4 hours ago
Note: I wrote this post as a type of newsletter for my local homeschool support group, after my thoughts were originally stirred by this Instagram post. I hope you all get some encouragement from it too!
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In many, many ways, homeschooling is easier now than ever before. There are so many curriculum companies, so many resources, so much inspiration and ideas. Back in my mom’s day, there were basically two major curriculum companies for homeschooling, and that was about it. We have an embarrassment of riches in the homeschool community now, and that really is a blessing.
But along with the amount of resources and moms sharing their homeschool journeys online, I think the mom in the trenches can sometimes get her homeschool vision skewed. So many people are sharing the fun things they are doing, or the different ways they are educating, complete with beautiful photos of elaborate projects and smiling faces. Many wax poetic about how wonderful homeschooling is, how much freedom it’s brought their family. I am confident this is all true and coming from a good place. Homeschooling is portrayed as beautiful, peaceful, aspirational, joyous even; a chance to take charge of your child’s education and homeschool them according to their own needs, a chance to give them the joy of learning. And homeschooling can be and often is all those things! But along they way, maybe some moms are picking up an idea, even subconsciously, that if homeschooling is not smooth sailing, maybe it’s not right.
We homeschool moms don’t as often share when we are going through a hard season of homeschooling. We don’t want to discourage potential homeschool moms from giving it a try, so we are quiet about the times when our child breaks down crying over copywork, when doors slam and frustration boils over, when school takes longer than a full time job would each day. We tuck it aside, save it to cry about to our husband or mom later, and put on a good face for our mom friends. But maybe we secretly wonder if we’re really supposed to be this exhausted, if maybe we’re doing it wrong, or if homeschooling isn’t really what we’re supposed to be doing at all.
Sometimes the advice is “lighten up a little bit”, “don’t worry so much about academics”, and “connection over curriculum - just put the books away for the day”. And maybe sometimes that advice is the answer. But it actually can’t be the answer to do that every day - the bookwork actually does need to get done eventually, and your child does need to learn to multiply someday, and if we lighten the workload forever we’re not actually not doing ourselves or the kids a favor. Self-discipline has to be learned in it’s own way in homeschooling, by child and mom. Putting the books aside can’t always be the solution. My mom used to say “it doesn’t have to be fun, it just has to get done”, and that’s a truism that homeschool moms don’t like to admit anymore, but that doesn’t mean it’s not still true.
Just because something is hard, doesn’t mean it’s not worthwhile. Just because there are bumps along the way, maybe whole years where homeschooling is a struggle, that doesn’t mean it’s not the right thing for your family. Just because no one is having fun right now, doesn’t mean you’ll be deprived of joy forever. A good marriage, for instance, is hard work, but we know how much joy and fulfillment comes when we stick it out through thick and thin, and we know that marriage is a good thing worth fighting for, even when we experience difficult seasons. I view homeschooling in much the same way.
The truth is (and I feel confident in saying you could ask any longterm homeschool veteran and she will confirm this), homeschooling is not always fun. It is actually hard work. There are going to be rough patches, rough seasons, rough years. It takes a level of grit, self-sacrifice, and mental toughness on the part of mom to make it for the long haul, and this is true no matter what style of homeschooling you choose.
Homeschooling takes a determination to see through the rough times until you come out on the other side, because everyone experiences struggles (they just don’t talk about it), and this too shall pass. It takes endurance to train your kids in study skills, self-discipline, and character development to make your days run smoother, and that’s not always fun. There often will be tears along the way. These are growing pains. These struggles don’t mean you’re doing anything wrong. It may mean you’re going to have to put in a little more effort and time into helping your child mature and grow…until one day you’re making dinner and realize that your child did a whole math worksheet today without breaking down. Until you notice that they actually read their Bible and pulled out their school books after breakfast without being asked. Until you see that instead of bickering with their younger sibling as per usual, they are on the couch helping their sibling work through a chapter book.
And that is when you get that surge of joy. So stiffen your spine, homeschool mom, and “learn to love what must be done*”, even when it’s hard. Pray for wisdom, pray for endurance, pray for patience, and stick it out. There will be joy along the way.
May God reward your work, friends, and I know He will when we homeschool as unto Him.
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*This is a phrase I think I originally heard from Mystic Winckler or Karen Andreola, but is attributed online to the poet, Goethe. I don't know where I heard it first, but it has become a refrain for my homeschool.
Yesterday it snowed. We had at least a couple inches on the ground, a couple days after I had planted my herb garden in our little porch greenhouse. The basil was wilting, so my son transferred it back to a portable pot and brought it inside for me.
Today, literally by the time the sun rose, all the snow was already melted, and my kids convinced me to let them go exploring in the woods alone. I gave them alarm whistles and walk talkies and sat on the porch waiting for them to come back. Dare I say, it was actually hot in the sunshine!
Such is spring in the mountains.
The last month has been a bit of a whirlwind. We had a nice Easter, and then before I knew it I had our homeschool group meeting, then visiting a co-op, then my son's birthday and a birthday party, then field trips and eye appointments. This week we'll have standardized testing, and two nights out with friends for me. It's a good busy, but busy nonetheless.
Homeschooling is going well, we're well into the homestretch and limping toward the finish line. I made limping sound like a bad thing just now, but it's more like finishing a bunch of our curriculum and trying to find some things to fill these last few weeks before we're officially done for the year. I bought this Shakespeare curriculum, I want to finish this book about the ancient Romans, and there will be spelling and math drills abounding. My daughter asked if we could start the second book in the Anne Of Green Gables series as a family read-aloud, so that might be on the horizon as well.
We've been on the go so much, I haven't had as much time to bake or experiment in the kitchen, and I'm itching to try making something new. I did buy coconut milk and seltzer water in preparation for making refreshing springtime beverages, and we've been stocking up on all the fruit. As summertime approaches, you'll probably find me gathering recipes to try when I actually have time to make things again (hopefully).
One new thing in April is that I re-started my no/low buy after falling off the wagon in March. I'm adjusting my rules a bit to allow myself to buy a couple things a month as long as they are less than a certain dollar amount. It's going well so far, and it's a good thing, because our puppy ended up costing us $800 this month. That was not a happy day.
Dot basically swallowed a toy, and ended up throwing it up, but still looked so miserable and listless that we were worried there was something else stuck in there. Our vet was closed for the day, so I ended up taking her to an emergency vet, and oh boy. Never again.
You know you've made a mistake when everyone in the office keeps calling an animal "your kiddo", while your actual kiddo is holding said animal. I would have walked out, but they took the dog away for an hour, and I had to strategically ask for her back before being able to escape. It cost that much just for an X-ray, and even though there wasn't anything obvious in there, they wanted to put her on an IV overnight! A dog, remember. And a dog which I already told them was still drinking plenty of water. I said I was taking her home to take our chances until our regular vet opened, and what do you know, she was 100% back to normal the next day.
Thankfully we were holding money aside to buy a new window, so we'll just have to wait another year. Who needs airtight windows anyway?
We went on a field trip to the zoo a couple weeks ago, and as we were walking down the paths, I noticed that I could smell the flowers, so our state is in that stage of spring now. Then when we went to church the other day, the flowering trees were just at their prime! I'm so glad I took some pictures that day, because as I mentioned, a few days later we had more snow. I was circling the tree, taking pictures and videos and big, deep breaths of the floral air, and I must have been making quite a spectacle of myself because a woman walked up and asked if I wanted a picture with the tree. I was a little embarrassed, but obviously agreed. She commented that she and her husband "were admiring your joy over the trees, and we just thought you needed a picture".
And all of a sudden I wasn't embarrassed anymore, because why would anyone not have joy over flowering trees? Joy is actually the right response, and who cares if everyone can see it? God could have just left all the flowers on the ground, but that would have been too obvious - instead He decorated branches with them. Isn't there something magnificent about that?
This week I hope you too find something that makes you so joyful that you make yourself a little ridiculous over it. Let it spill over, scatter it all around, and don't be embarrassed if someone comments on it, because why should you not splash a little joy on them too?
"Let the heavens rejoice, and let the earth be glad;Let the sea roar, and all its fullness;12Let the field be joyful, and all that is in it.Then all the trees of the woods will rejoice before the Lord.
For He is coming, for He is coming to judge the earth.He shall judge the world with righteousness,And the peoples with His truth."Psalm 96:11-13
Happy Spring, friends!
The first quarter of the year is past, and as I sit down to share this reading summary, I am a little disappointed in it. I was sure I read more than this in the first part of the year - but when I look at my stack of half-finished books, perhaps this somewhat short list makes sense. I'm quite late in sharing my quarter-one reads, so I'm just going to slap this round-up post on the blog even though I feel like I forgot a few books. Hopefully there will be more to share next quarter!
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Drowning by T. J. Newman - I started this book the day I had my gum surgery as a distraction, and it was perfect! A plane goes down in the ocean, and a few passengers are trapped in the body of the plane underwater (this has been an actual nightmare I've had). This book is about the efforts to get them out, with the story of one broken family interspersed along the way. I was worried I wasn't going to like the ending, but it ended up being very satisfying. I definitely recommend! Content Notes: There is some bad language in this book, including the f-word, and many of the people from the plane die a gruesome death.
Stand: Christianity Vs. Social Justice by Jon Benzinger - This book is a wonderful rebuttal to the social justice movement from a Christian perspective. The author approaches everything with lots of Scripture, and gives great practical advice for how Christians can stand up against the unbiblical version of justice which is the social justice movement. There are also really thoughtful discussion questions at the end of each chapter, which makes it perfect for a group discussion setting. I highly recommend it for any Christian, whether you are currently facing issues in this area or not.
Advancing Christian Unity by Anthony Burgess - I am attempting to read a book written by a Puritan each month this year, and this was my read for January. Burgess does a great job of addressing Jesus's heart for the unity of the church, obstacles to unity, as well as defining what true unity looks like in the church (which does not exclude doctrine!). I highlighted so many pages and found this book so personally encouraging - I think it would also help someone to know how to handle situations where unity is being sinfully threatened.
Fallen by Tim Chaffey - This book is a deep dive into a passage of the Bible that has caused alot of puzzlement, Genesis 6. While the author speculated somewhat in this book, he was really upfront about what things he is drawing from Scripture and what things are just his own speculation. I wasn't sure I would put things quite like he did in some spots, and some aspects of the subject matter were disturbing, but it is rather a dark subject. His goal was to argue for the fallen angel view of Genesis 6 over the Sethite and other views, and I think this book was really persuasive on that front. Wouldn't necessarily recommend it unless you are already wondering about this passage, but if you are, I thought he did a good job of presenting his case.
Rules For Walking In Fellowship by John Owen - This was a great, short Puritan read that was packed with Scripture (I believe it's actually only a portion of a longer work). I thought this book gave alot of useful reminders of how we are to remain in fellowship with other Christians, and I really found it uplifting. It would be a great read to start with if you are new to Puritan writings!
Everywhere To Hide by Siri Mitchell - This book would be in the suspense/thriller category. Whitney Garrison suffers from face blindness, so when she is witness to a murder, she can't identify the killer. When she finds out the victim was actually waiting to meet her, the mystery deepens. Siri Mitchell's thrillers, including this one, are set in Washington D. C., and I think she does a good job of weaving in the political intrigue without being boring or too complicated. I enjoyed this one! Content Notes: Aside from the obvious violence involved in the plot, this was a clean book.
A Lady's Guide To Fortune Hunting by Sophie Irwin - This book is set in the regency era, and gave alot of Pride And Prejudice vibes - but from the perspective of the fortune hunter, which is usually the villain in Austen novels! This book was a fun and quirky romance that was perfect for an Austen aficionado like me. I loved it! Content notes: I think there may have been a couple mild curse words, and references to "ladies of ill repute", but it was otherwise clean.
The Biblical Case For Cessationism by Tom Pennington - In this book, Pennington argues the case for cessationism, which is the view that the miraculous gifts, such as tongues and miracles, were for the apostolic era and have now ceased. Alot of continuationists spin that to say that cessationists don't believe the Holy Spirit is working today, but that couldn't be further from the truth. I loved how Pennington gave the biblical arguments while explaining the gifts biblically, the reasons why we think tongues, etc, were important in the early church, and how the Holy Spirit works in the church today. Highly recommend no matter what side of the fence you are on.
Shipwreck At The Bottom Of The World by Jennifer Armstrong - I read this book to the kids for school, and it was a great one to read as winter is ending. This is the story of Shackleton and his ill-fated expedition to traverse Antartica. The most amazing part of the story of the Endurance is how every man survived! This book explains the grueling conditions that the crew suffered, and the tenacity and leadership of Shackleton as he led them to a rescue. A couple things that weren't covered extensively but were mentioned in this book are the faith of some of the men, and a mysterious event where three of the men, who were trekking across a brutal island in search of rescue, later found that they all kept thinking there was a fourth man with them - it reminds me of a certain Bible story. Content Notes: Mentions of millions of years, and a joke the men had about "wives and sweethearts" never meeting.
The Great Divorce by C. S. Lewis - This was a re-read for me. In this book, Lewis imagines a group of tourists from Hell visiting the very outskirts of Heaven. I have found this book a bit confusing in the past as it is purely an imaginative interpretation of what such a scenario could be like, not based on any biblical arguments. So I wouldn't read this as any sort of doctrinal treatise. What shone through for me on this reading was Lewis’s insight into human nature and the sinful inclinations which keep a person from turning to God. As a sobering look into our sinful nature and choices that keep us from the truth, this book was very worthwhile - if you are looking for biblical accuracy on the afterlife, this isn’t that book, and I don’t think it’s meant to be.
Hoax For Hire by Laura Martin - I love reading middle grade fiction for a mental break, and this one was purely for fun! A family of hoaxers is secretly responsible for every strange story or legendary creature you’ve ever heard of, going back centuries - but 12-year-old Grayson wants out. He has plans to apply for a photography scholarship to a boarding school - until his dad disappears and his grandpa appears to be kidnapped by a competing hoaxing family. Grayson and his brother must figure out how to save his dad and grandpa, and the family’s livelihood. Content Notes: Quite a bit of parental neglect as the boys are mostly on their own, but it’s resolved in the end. Grayson’s brother is high-school aged, and “makes out” with his girlfriend or mentions it a couple different times.
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What is the best book you’ve read so far in 2024?
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