1 hour ago
Last year I unfriended half of my Facebook friends.
It seemed like a drastic move, but it was the culmination of months of evaluation of social media and how I was using it. I hated how my first instinct in the morning had become checking my phone. I hated how I would randomly find myself with my phone in my hand and social media open, without actually remembering reaching for my phone. I hated how social media had affected some of my friendships, and how it was affecting my own attitude toward the world. I hated that it was stealing my time.
At the time, Facebook was my biggest struggle, so that is where I put all my thought and effort. What were the things I liked about Facebook? What were the things I didn’t like? How could I make adjustments to keep the aspects that were useful to me and discard the rest? What was making me waste so much time on Facebook, and how could I eliminate those factors?
After a lot of thought and even prayer about the subject, I decided the only thing that would help would be to drastically cut my friends list, unfollow a bunch of pages, and keep my Facebook use to the function that was most useful to me - which was sharing photos with my close family and friends who appreciated seeing them. I wrote a whole post about my unfriending process here. I think it even shocked some of you! But I knew in my heart it had to be done.
Since I took the steps I outlined in that post, I have felt so much more free in regards to Facebook. It’s not the time suck for me that it used to be. I might check it once a day, but since I cracked down on my notifications and the people I follow, there is rarely something new. I hop on and I hop off. I’ll occasionally share albums so my grandparents can see my photos, and occasionally I’ll share an article that I find interesting, but that is rare. My Facebook use overall has probably declined by 70%, and it feels great!
However, Instagram is a different story.
Is it possible that all my bad social media habits just switched over to Instagram? Did the pandemic throw me off, since social media was the only way to connect with my friends for a while? I don’t know what went wrong, but Instagram has been slowly taking over my life this year, and I’ve realized that it’s time for me to re-evaluate that platform now. I’m hoping I can make a similar transformation to my relationship with Facebook, because once again I find myself with my phone in my hand and Instagram open, without knowing how I got there.
I hate how social media (Instagram) steals all the free moments in my day. Yes, they are small moments, times when I’m waiting for a child to finish a worksheet so we can move on to the next subject, or waiting in the line at the grocery store. The ten minutes after my Bible reading in the morning, when I type out a quick Instagram post. A half hour after my workout when I post a short video.
But all those “small moments” add up to a lot of time, time that could be better spent on other things. I could read a book while waiting for that worksheet. I could shoot a quick text to a real-life friend in the grocery store line. I could spend ten minutes memorizing Scripture. I could take some time to just be still and think.
Those things are all worth so much more, in the long run, than a few hearts on Instagram.
So it’s time to evaluate Instagram. Usually I would wait for my annual social media break, but after having a chat with Derek, I think I’m going to try a different approach to making Instagram adjustments. More on that coming up this month.
Do you have any boundaries in place for yourself in regards to your time on social media? Or have you taken any measures to make it easier?
"The voices of children echo throughout life. The first thing learned is generally the last thing forgotten."
-Charles Spurgeon, Come Ye Children
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It's going to be tricky to get a post up on Sundays during my 31 Days of blogging, so I am keeping it simple with Sunday quotes. Every week I'll share a quote that stood out to me from one of the books I'm reading. This one stopped me in my tracks because it's so true, and I want to take care to teach my children to look to Christ always. I hope that's one of the things they learn first in our house, and I need to take care not to neglect this in favor of meaningless distractions.
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On Sundays I'll also try to give a peek at the week ahead! Here's my tentative schedule (keep in mind that this may change, but if one topic sounds particularly interesting to you, let me know and I'll prioritize it).
Monday: Social Media And Me: An Update
Tuesday: My Morning Routine
Wednesday: A Few Thoughts On Habits
Thursday: An Argument For Creating Tangible Things
Friday: To be determined
Saturday: To be determined
Strength I find, to meet my trials here...
Trusting in my Father’s wise bestowment,
I’ve no cause for worry or for fear."
I’ve no cause for worry or for fear."
We sang the words, surrounded by faces that will forever be seared into my memory. As we sat, I looked down at the program for the memorial. The face of a dear lady, one of my many "church grandmas" from my childhood, smiled up at me.
"Help me, Lord, when toil and trouble meeting,
E’er to take, as from a father’s hand,
One by one, the days, the moments fleeting,
Till I reach the promised land."
Another dear face, a pastor I haven't seen since I was 12 years old, stood behind the pulpit etched with the words "Jesus Is Lord". He spoke about how Jesus could return at any moment, and how we all long for the day when we can see His face, as the woman we had all gathered to remember is looking upon Him now. And my eyes filled with tears, my heart filled with something bittersweet. She led a life well lived for Christ, and unlike some memorials, I knew the kind words about her were not exaggerated in the wake of her death. I knew all the words about her faithful service were true.
I hugged her husband, a white-haired "church grandpa", and choked up a little again.
We gathered downstairs for refreshments, and I looked at the quilted wall hangings she had made, photographs of her in her wedding dress. Her name will not be in a headline or a history book. But there is nothing small about quietly serving others, and faithfully encouraging them to know and love Jesus more. This is a truly worthy way to spend a life. And the One who matters most, He sees and rewards His faithful servants.
I looked around at all the people she had made an impact on, people who still are such a dear part of my own story. And I realized, this lump in my throat wasn't just sadness for a lady a wouldn't see again, and a time that has passed. I realized it was also joy. Because no matter where life takes us, I know someday I'll gather with all these dear people again, around His throne, and there will be joy untainted by sorrow forevermore. And this all because of our precious Savior.
This wasn't a funeral to grieve; this was a memorial to celebrate what Christ has done to save us, and to look forward to the time when we will see her again. What a beautiful thing to be able to say. What a wonderful way to remember one who has entered His glory. And what a Savior, who takes away the sting even from death.
“O Death, where is your sting? O Hades, where is your victory?”...But thanks be to God, who gives us the victory through our Lord Jesus Christ."
1 Corinthians 15:55,57
Read all my 31 Days Of Small Things posts here.
As I type, I'm sipping on a warm chai. I hear the kids laughing and chanting a rhyme outside the window as warm beams of sunlight angle across the grass. I'm in my cozy pajamas, and the twinkle lights are on.
I figured if I'm going to write about coziness, I might as well get in a cozy mood.
This sudden inspiration for coziness actually came at the end of a pretty rotten day. I checked, and there is a full moon right around the corner, so that might explain it (there is something to that). Everything was a struggle all day, and I quickly found myself retreating into "hide" mode - meaning I locked myself in the closet a couple times to calm myself. Let's just say the atmosphere of the home was not what I wanted it to be yesterday.
After working out and taking a shower, I put on an episode of Gilmore Girls while I fixed my hair. I'm rewatching the show this fall - the last time I watched it all the way through, Wyatt was a baby, so it's been a while. And I started thinking about how many times I've referred to Gilmore Girls as a "cozy fall show". What exactly made it so cozy anyway? And could I replicate that for my kids? A little coziness would be a nice reset for everyone.
After careful analysis (ahem), I pinpointed all the elements that make Gilmore Girls so cozy to me.
Warm Lighting
If you pay attention, you'll notice there is so much warm light in the show - everywhere you look there are twinkle lights or lamps lit - and I think that's a big part of what makes it cozy. It gives you the feeling of being tucked inside a warm house. Whether it's candles, lamps (of which I want to buy more), or twinkle lights, I think that aspect would be really easy to replicate daily in our home. I already do this somewhat with candles, but I want to get a couple more good lamps to illuminate the dark corners.
Good Books
Is there anything more cozy than curling up with a good book? If you are a reader, you can't help but love all the references to books in Gilmore Girls - I don't know if all the books mentioned are actually good, but you know the characters think they are good, and that's what counts. We've been adding more just-for-fun read-aloud time to our homeschool, and it's something I want to remember as a cozy way to reset.
Seasonal Decorations
They really go all out on the seasonal decorations in Stars Hollow, don't they? I'd love to know if any real-life town is like that. All I know is that my kids are always excited when I pull out the the fabric pumpkins and faux foliage that I keep in the box under my bed. When things are starting to get stale around the house, some seasonal decorations are a nice touch to make everyone feel like staying home!
Warm Drinks
Chai, cider, hot chocolate, and of course, coffee. Are the characters in that show ever not drinking something warm? I am blessed to be able to say that every morning I'm awakened by the smell of coffee, thanks to Derek, and it's glorious! But since I don't let my kids drink the stuff yet, I've been buying extra jugs of apple juice at the store lately, so I can periodically make hot cider in the crockpot. It makes the whole house smell good, and it's perfect for keeping everyone happy while we read aloud.
Music
There is so much music mentioned in Gilmore Girls, not to mention the town minstrel, and it sets the mood for the whole show. This is something I'm terrible at, but I would really like to get better at remembering to add some music into our day. I could start something in the morning while we do our Bible time, or I could play soft music over nap/quiet time. I think music would be a really great way to calm the house a bit and boost some moods.
A Busy Kitchen
This is one I never thought about before, but as I was watching the show last night, it struck me that in so many of the episodes, there is a busy kitchen scene (usually with Suki). Even if we don't see Suki, Lorelei and Rory are always ordering in good food. There is something about just knowing that there is something good to eat in the kitchen, or something bubbling on the stove, that makes the whole thing that much more comforting - like virtual comfort food.
I would like my house to feel like that for my kids, like anytime they walk in the kitchen there might be something good to eat waiting for them. I've never been good about meal planning, and even baking (something I love to do) has fallen off in recent months. I'd like to put a little more attention back into the kitchen this winter.
A Close-Knit Community
It's sad that so many Americans have never really experienced a close-knit community, isn't it? Stars Hollow, with it's host of eccentric characters that care about each other despite their oddities, is not exactly the norm anymore. We've lost something.
I think 50-100 years ago, more people knew what a small community felt like. But if you are lucky, you've been part of a close-knit community at some point in your life. When I was growing up, we went to a really small, close-knit church that almost felt like family, Even today, my own family has enough roots in the town where I live that occasionally someone I don't recognize will ask how a family member is. There are remnants here and there.
Even as it's harder to find a close-knit community for my children to grow up within, I am trying to build our own, with family, friends, and our church family. Even if we didn't have an option for those things, there is a sense in which a family is it's own little community, and if it's a Christian family, it is by nature a small cell of a larger community that stretches around the world - the church, the body of Christ. A family can support and love each other despite oddities, and even host their own "community events" in the form of traditions - and we can connect ourselves to the larger context of the church through learning about church history and heroes of the faith. So even as Stars Hollow towns are more rare, I think there are ways to still give our families that sense of belonging to something bigger. We just have to keep your eyes out for opportunities.
Is it worth all this effort to add some coziness to our life? Does this really matter?
I've been thinking about this a lot lately, about how we as moms can help set a good atmosphere for our home. I sincerely think it's something that is worth pouring into. For me, chaotic days like yesterday happen too often for my liking. But my hope is that, overall, when my children grow up, they'll hear the word "home" and think of a cozy, safe place, with parents, family, and friends who love them.
In a sense, a person's idea of home can even shape their idea of Heaven, and the God who reigns over all. I don't always reflect Him to my kids as well as I want to, within the atmosphere of our home (or in general, honestly). But in these small ways, I'm trying, and I'm praying the Lord will use my sometimes pitiful efforts and make something beautiful out of it by His grace.
What do you do to make your home cozy for the fall or winter? Do you feel like you are part of a close-knit community? And, most pertinently, what other cozy fall shows should I check out?
Remember how the last couple years I’ve done a Write 31 Days project?
For those of you who may have no idea what I’m talking about, Write 31 Days used to be an event that bloggers participated in every October. The challenge was to write around a certain topic every day for the entire month. A pretty big blogger used to host it, there was a linkup so you could find other bloggers who were participating, it was a whole thing.
I, as per usual, was late to the party.
I first participated in Write 31 Days in 2018, right as the project was passed off to a new host and the whole thing was winding down. I participated again last year, even though there was no longer an official event, and there were maybe a few other people participating. Now this year, the official website appears to be down.
Even though Write 31 Days is no longer a “thing”, I still like the idea of it, and I like what it does for my blogging. Sometimes I forget that it’s okay for blog posts to not be a huge production, and Write 31 Days tends to break me out of that mindset and just get me writing again. Personally, I like to read blogs that aren’t so polished, that are honest and personal and not done for any other reason than to just write and possibly connect with other real human beings. Writing every day forces me to get back to that a little bit.
The last couple weeks I was putting more effort than usual into my blog Instagram account, just to see if I really gave Instagram a good go, if I could make genuine connections there. If it could give me the same feeling that blogging did for so many years in it’s hey-day, where there was reciprocity and you felt like you were making friends, not just gaining followers.
Spoiler Alert: No, Instagram is still not like blogging, even when I give it my best effort. It seems the focus of Instagram will always largely be about obtaining the largest number of followers. Even when you do make Instagram friends, it’s hard not to get sucked into the numbers game.
Blogging, the way I’ve always done it, is smaller. It’s cozy. It’s inviting someone into your living room to chat, instead of shouting at them from the sidewalk. Maybe more people can hear you on the sidewalk. But in the living room you can look into a friend’s eyes and just be still for a minute.
And what’s so wrong with small things anyway? So many of the small things in life, or the things most of the world would consider small, are the most meaningful.
So, my topic for this year’s Write 31 Days project (maybe I should call it something else since that’s no longer a thing? Suggestions welcome):
31 Days Of Small Things.
Over the next 31 days, I’m hoping to refocus on the things that are small. Small ways I’m spending my time, good and bad. Small habits, successes, and failures. Small things that add up to something bigger, until you realize the small things were really the big things all along.
Here is my tentative list of sub-topics:
Social Media - I want to spend some time discussing social media because this is a big huge thing in our world, and my personal choices on it seem so small - but they make more of an impact than I know. Not always in a good way.
Habits - Sharing some general thoughts on habits, some good habits that have worked out well for me, and some areas that I want to work on.
Hobbies - Whatever happened to hobbies anyway? Why does everything have to be so… professional all the time? I think hobbies are still worthwhile, and I want to talk about that a bit this week. (Would it be cheating if I included a "recent reads" post under this topics?)
Small Things That Really Matter - You are not going to get worldly accolades for reading your Bible or raising children or making dinner every night - but small doesn’t equal insignificant. So many things that are small in the sight of the world are really the things that really matter.
I hope you’ll stick around the blog this month as I ramble about some of these topics! And if you have any input about something you want to read about related to any of the above, I’m all ears (or eyes…since this is written communication…you know what I mean).
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P.S. My long-time blog friend Brittney is also participating in the Write 31 project! Check out her blog for daily-sh posts this month too! Also, I declare that Bekah is honorarily participating because she blogs every day anyway. And if you have a blog and want to join in, it's not too late! Please do!
A Quote
I think this quote section is going to be where I dump my World War 1 thoughts on you for the next few Wednesday Five posts. I’m reading so many interesting books about WW1 right now.
What has struck me most in learning about WW1 is how much most of the leaders of the countries involved did not want war. There were a couple people in Austria-Hungary who wanted retribution on Serbia, but all the allies involved seemed to try their hardest not to let a war start. It was like a very tragic “comedy of errors“, riddled with miscommunication and mistrust.
This part of the book A World Undone by G. J. Meyer, really got to me. A double ultimatum was issued by Germany to Russia and France, and the German ambassador went to meet with Sazonov, Russia’s Foreign Minister. The last ditch effort at avoiding a war fell apart.
“In his hands he had two messages, both of them declarations of war. One was for use if Russia gave no answer to the ultimatum, the other a reply to a negative answer. In his distress and confusion he pressed both on Sazanov and burst into tears.Or so Sazanov wrote years later in his memoirs. Pourtales’s recollection was that Sazonov wept first. Whatever the sequence, apparently both men cried. They embraced, then pulled apart and began to exchange accusations.‘This was a criminal act of yours,’ said Sazonov. ‘The curses of the nations will be upon you.’‘We were defending our honor.’‘Your honor was not involved.’Finally, they parted forever, Sazonov helping the distraught Pourtales to the door.”
When I was reading this, it struck me how the Fall and sin’s curse didn’t just affect mankind, and our relationship to God, and creation, and interpersonal relationships - it affects relationships between nations too. Peace is so tenuous, and war has been a part of the story of humanity ever since Adam fell.
As I write this, I’m also thinking about someday, when every knee shall bow before Christ, and He will reign for a thousand years and then create a new Heaven and Earth where sin and death are no more. Then we will have peace forever, and people from every tribe, tongue, and nation, even people who fought and killed each other in wars like WW1, will wipe their tears and sing praise to the Lord together. That will be a glorious thing to see.
A Book
Aside from my collection of WW1 nonfiction, I’m reading a book on prayer by John MacArthur called Alone With God (the Kindle version is only $2!). Prayer is always something that I wish I was better at, and I’m getting a lot of good thoughts out of this one. What specifically stuck out to me was how MacArthur says the focus of prayer needs to be God, and too often we act like we’re talking to God when really we’re just focusing on ourselves. That is so true.
A Bit Of Nature
Before it snowed two weeks ago...yes, it snowed! Not a little bit either, it snowed a few inches. But before it snowed I was worried it would kill all the leaves and I wouldn’t be able to get any good fall pictures of the kids. So I took them outside by our long, pretty mountain grass, and we had a little impromptu fall photo shoot. The pictures turned out really cute (I'll put more on Instagram).
I love long grass like this. You know, we learned that those little bunches at the end of a piece of grass are actually technically a flower.
I've mentioned these about a million times, but I wanted to recommend (again) the Rush Revere: Time Travel Adventures With Exceptional Americans book series. We like them on audio. My kids were SO EXCITED when I told them I got the next book, Rush Revere And The Presidency, at the library. Wyatt asked if he could listen to it today, and he and Gwen have their chairs pulled up to the CD player so they can listen to the story. They think Liberty (the time-traveling horse) is hilarious, and I love the strong American values and history in the stories. This one that we're listening to is also great if you are trying to teach your kids about the election. I'm planning on adding it to my election resources blog post.
A Moment Of Happiness
It's hard for me to isolate just one moment right now, because I've been feeling generally happy and content for the last several weeks. That's odd for 2020, isn't it? I just have this peace that no matter what happens, the Lord is sovereign and it's all going to be okay. I love my country and am so proud to be an American, and it kills me to see the turmoil. I also believe strongly in caring about the wellbeing of the nation, continuing to fight for our freedoms, and being an active citizen as a Christian. But this world was never meant to be my home.
Maybe it took a year like 2020 to make that extra clear.
We're just passing through, and if you believe in Christ's sacrifice to save you from your sin - well, the place we're going is promised to be so much better. I've always wanted to live my life with eternity in mind, there was always a part of me that knew how important that was - that's part of why I named my blog Through Clouded Glass all those years ago (based on 1 Corinthians 13: ). When you keep your eyes on Jesus and live with eternity in mind, the world can't touch you the same way. That's where I'm trying to keep focus, and nothing else in the world is as calming as resting in Him.
I wish that for all of you this Wednesday.
"Today we're going to make butter!" she announced. "Have you done your arm workouts lately?" She put some fresh cream and salt in a mason jar, and one by one we took turns shaking it until we heard a thumping inside the jar. The bonnet-clad lady twisted the lid, and there it was - fresh butter.
She opened a couple more doors on the oven, and slid out a pan of hot gingerbread, and I still remember how good it smelled, and how satisfying it was with a little of our butter spread on top.
And that was my first memory of learning about the pioneers.
I think what made me remember that field trip so well was, in fact, the yummy gingerbread. There is nothing that can bring a historical period to life like experiencing a little piece of it through your five senses. I think taste is an especially good sense to include!
I am trying to think of ways I can give my kids the same effect for our school subjects this year, ways that I can help a topic stick in their minds using taste, smell, touch, sight, and hearing. I have a whole post about including the five senses in learning on the Rooted Family blog this week, with really SIMPLE ideas, because I am all about simple homeschool activities. If a learning activity isn't easy for me to do with my kids, it probably won't happen. I hope the post can get your wheels turning and your creative juices flowing on how you can include all five senses in your homeschool day!
I also wanted to link a few of my favorite resources and products that I referred to in that post over here! So these are a few things that I'm trying to include this year.
(Some affiliate links below.)
Historical Figure Toys - Rainbow Resource sells these little toy sets that can correspond with different historical periods, and I have to admit I got pretty excited when I discovered this! I bought my kids the Revolutionary War soldiers, British and Continental troops, and I am going to break them out as we read more about our nation's founding this year!
Rush Revere Series on Audio - As we wind down our school day in the afternoons, I've been trying to remember to put on an audiobook while the kids color or finish up their copywork. Our favorite right now is the Rush Revere series! We are currently listening to Rush Revere And The Presidency which is a great one for an election year. We've also been working through the Little House series on audio. There is something about novels that makes history stick in the mind so much better, and it's also a great opportunity to give my kids practice at listening well.
Background Music - I love Kristi Hill's resources on teaching music appreciation for kids. If you aren't signed up for her emails, I'd recommend it - she sends out "Music Monday" emails with links and activity suggestions for different pieces of music. She also has playlists on Spotify which make great background music for a homeschool day!
Picture Books With Recipes - I'm trying to make note of the picture books we come across that include recipes, so we can make them together! "Thundercake" is on our list of recipes to try right now, at the back of the book by the same name. (If you know of any other picture books that include recipes, please tell me! Still trying to gather a list.)
Picnic Blanket - Getting outside is the perfect way to create sensory memories of our homeschool days, and I am finding our waterproof picnic blanket (that my friend actually got me for my wedding!) really useful this year - we are trying to do more of our school reading outside, and spreading a blanket amidst the grass and flowers makes it that much more enjoyable.
Five Senses Learning Ebook - If you decide you really want to get serious about including all five senses in your learning, I wanted to also point you to my friend Elizabeth's ebook on the subject! She has put together a "Five Senses Letter-A-Week Activity Guide" for the younger homeschool crowd. I haven't read the ebook, but I have read Elizabeth's blog for a while and she has a ton of interesting activity ideas. If you have preschool kids and want to make their learning more sensory and fun, I think her book would be a great place to start! I also asked Elizabeth if she had any encouragement to offer on this subject, and here's what she wanted to say:
What better way to learn than by captivating the five senses? By incorporating opportunities for your child to HEAR - SEE - TOUCH - SMELL - and TASTE as they learn, they're able to experience the world around them in a way that would not be possible with a textbook alone.
Just from my own educational experiences as a kid, I can say that she's right - I think including all five senses wherever possible is the most effective way to draw your children into the learning process in a way that will make an lasting impression on them.
If you have any favorite activities, products, or resources that incorporate learning through the five senses, I'd love it if you'd add them in the comments!
What memories do you have of a time when something you were learning really came alive for you?
P.S. Don't forget to check out my post on Rooted Family - I'm serious when I say including the five senses can be really easy, and I hope that post can encourage you that providing memorable homeschool experiences doesn't have to be overwhelming.
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