3 hours ago
The other day I was scrolling through one of my social network feeds, and I came across a photo of a postpartum belly with stretch marks.
The caption on the photo is what caught my attention - it said "For every woman who is unhappy with her postpartum marks is another who wishes she had them."
Those of you who have been reading my blog for a while know that it wasn't easy for me to get pregnant with either of my children - and I loved this quote because it is so true, and it's something I have thought often about similar pregnancy and postpartum "complaints".
I read through some of the comments on the photo, because I felt it made such a good point - and many of the comments were from people analyzing this poor girl's stretch marks - how far postpartum was she, her habits during pregnancy, and those "thank goodness I didn't get stretch marks like that" type comments.
I was a bit taken aback. First of all because her belly really didn't look bad - my stretch marks are worse, at least at the moment. But secondly because it seemed as if these people were completely missing the point.
Yes, pregnancy can be uncomfortable, even painful. And yes, your body will never be the same afterward. But to have a child, to carry them in your womb? It's a privilege to be able to experience any of it at all, even the unpleasant sides of child-bearing. There are women out there who wish more than anything that they could have a few stretch marks on their bellies.
I feel so blessed to have the stretch marks, even as bad as they are. They are a reminder of what I once thought I might never have - my greatest earthly gifts, my children.
There is no way I would change any of it.
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I wanted to share this poem I found as well, because it is beautiful, and it fits in nicely with my feelings on the subject of stretch marks . . .
"When I put on my bikini,
I get all kinds of stares.
They don't know how I can act
like they're not even there.
They once were red as fire,
and although they'll slowly fade
They'll always remind me of
the life that we once made.
I've got a mark for every worry,
and trust there were not few.
One for each and every time
you kicked me while you grew.
A stripe for each chubby cheek,
10 fingers and 10 toes.
Another for the times I've held you tight
and kissed your nose.
I watched my body swell so large
while you grew big inside
and I couldn't care much less about them,
blinded by my pride.
Now they remind me of your smiles
and the hairs atop your head,
And someday they'll remind me
of the funny things you said.
They're my zebra stripes, my stretch marks,
my war and battle scars,
And I'll never be too bothered
because I know that you are ours.
They may not be too flattering
to my midsection, it's true,
But I'd get them again all over
if it meant that I'd get you."
-Poem by Caitlyn Blake, shared with permission.
Originally posted here and also shared on Birth Without Fear
Today I have a guest post written by Leslie at Did You Hear About The Morgans?! Leslie is going to talk about marriage today and how she has incorporated a 101 in 1001 list into that - it's a great idea, I think! Read on to get all the details, and thanks Leslie for guest posting for me while I adjust to having two kiddos!
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A few months back I started reading a little ole blog called Through Clouded Glass written by Callie. ;-)
I have no idea how I found it but I did and I love it. I connect with Callie so much because she is a Christian wife and a mom. I'm two of the three and hope to be 3/3 one day in the future. I was honored when Callie said she would like for me to write a guest post for her blog so HERE GOES!
I'm Leslie Morgan and I blog over at Did YOU Hear about the Morgans? I have been married to my husband, Matt, since 1/1/11. We live in Spartanburg, SC. I'm a Speech Language Pathologist and Matt works at The Home Depot and is a Photographer as well! We love our little life and are just chasing our dreams.
Matt and I have a great relationship. We enjoy traveling together and doing other fun things together. Because of that, we decided to do a 101 in 1001 list TOGETHER. Well, let's be honest, it was my idea but when I mentioned it to Matt he was all for it. I was thrilled because I knew it would be a great relationship builder and fun at the same time.
We made our list together of 51 goals and then we each made 25 individual goals. Y'all, it was hard to come up with 101 goals. We wanted them to be achievable obviously BUT not just easy peasy goals either. Since we got married on New Year's Day we decided that our first anniversary and the first of the year would be the perfect day to start! The end date is September 28th, 2014.
You can link here to find our most updated list and all of the goals we have met.
Some of our favorites have been....
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A few months back I started reading a little ole blog called Through Clouded Glass written by Callie. ;-)
I have no idea how I found it but I did and I love it. I connect with Callie so much because she is a Christian wife and a mom. I'm two of the three and hope to be 3/3 one day in the future. I was honored when Callie said she would like for me to write a guest post for her blog so HERE GOES!
I'm Leslie Morgan and I blog over at Did YOU Hear about the Morgans? I have been married to my husband, Matt, since 1/1/11. We live in Spartanburg, SC. I'm a Speech Language Pathologist and Matt works at The Home Depot and is a Photographer as well! We love our little life and are just chasing our dreams.
Matt and I have a great relationship. We enjoy traveling together and doing other fun things together. Because of that, we decided to do a 101 in 1001 list TOGETHER. Well, let's be honest, it was my idea but when I mentioned it to Matt he was all for it. I was thrilled because I knew it would be a great relationship builder and fun at the same time.
We made our list together of 51 goals and then we each made 25 individual goals. Y'all, it was hard to come up with 101 goals. We wanted them to be achievable obviously BUT not just easy peasy goals either. Since we got married on New Year's Day we decided that our first anniversary and the first of the year would be the perfect day to start! The end date is September 28th, 2014.
Side note: We chose a 101 in 1001 list because it was over a longer period of time but not too long. Also, it goes throughout each season several times so if there are a couple of "big" things that we can only do in certain seasons, we have time to do them all!
You can link here to find our most updated list and all of the goals we have met.
Some of our favorites have been....
-Sell something on Etsy---We have become a little crafty mostly out of necessity at first and then for fun! We have sold 7 items so far. We have been super busy with other aspects of life so we have no sold much in a while but plan to get back to it in the new year.
-Visit the Biltmore---We did this in August when my Mom was in town! SUCH A BLAST! If you live local or visit the Asheville area, you must see it!
-Start a small business----We have actually done this TWICE. Matt started his photography business and I have started a Scentsy business. We are still on the ground floor of both but it's so fun.
-(one of my goals) Find a yummy Low Country Boil recipe and make it---Delicious, I tell you! This was a a good goal.
-(one of Matt's goals) Take Leslie to an Air Show---The Mr. grew up with his Dad in the AF so they loved Air Shows and until we met, I didn't even know what they were! We went this past summer and it was so fun. Hope to do it again some day.
So there you have it, our 101 in 1001 list. Guys, this has been one of the most rewarding things we have done in our short 2 years of marriage. If you are looking for a way to reconnect and/or just grow in your marriage, I think this is a good way to do just that!
Thanks for reading! Come check out our blog sometime and Keep Callie and her family in your thoughts and prayers as they enjoy their time as a family of 4!
P.S. If you have any questions about a 101 in 1001 list, let me know. Also, if you're interested in Scentsy, check out my site :)
Today I'm sharing a guest post from Lauren over at The Unlikely Runners, as she talks about her relationship with her fiancé (congratulations again Lauren!), and choosing a spouse. Thanks for guest posting for me, Lauren!
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Hi! I’m Lauren and I blog over at The Unlikely Runners. Most of the time you can find me talking about running, working out, healthy eating, fitness and marathon training, but I just recently got engaged so now you will often find posts that document my adventures with my fiancé, Alex. When Callie first asked for people to volunteer as guest posters I was a little hesitant; I am not married {yet} and I don’t have kids {yet}, so I really didn’t fall into the category of her main readers. However, I feel like God has blessed me in so many ways over the last 2 years of my life and I just couldn’t pass up an opportunity to share with you how He has worked in me.
You see, a little over 2 years ago I was living in a place that I knew God was not happy with; I had made many poor choices in my life through college and I ended up in a marriage that was detrimental to me and my family as well as living a life with no real career path and no focus or motivation. I grew up attending church and I was surrounded by Christian morals my whole life, but during this time in my life I lost many friends and hurt many family members and I hurt myself in a lot of ways too. But God is faithful in all ways.
My then husband made some very, very poor choices and it eventually led to our divorce; a divorce that was painful at the time but a true blessing in disguise from God. It was at this point that I was able to experience true, unending love from my Heavenly Father. He gave me family, He gave me new friends and a new church and He gave me the therapy of running, all of this leading to a healing process that I am still in awe of.
Fast forward to one year after my divorce and God brings a wonderful, Godly man to the single’s group at my church. His name was Alex. After several months of hanging out with Alex within the boundaries of our single’s ministry and after much persuasion from a friend I agreed to meet him for coffee, just to talk! I had no intentions of dating anyone, I was very happily single, I was enjoying my job and my friends and running races was my passion. But God clearly had other plans for me, and I’m so glad that He did.
One year and 15 days after we officially started dating Alex asked me to marry him! We are planning a Memorial Day weekend wedding in Texas and I have never been happier in my life.
But why do I tell you all of this? While I am no expert at relationships and while I clearly don’t have all the answers I did want to share with you some things that God has taught me about relationships, specifically in how to chose a proper spouse, in hopes that you might take on some new insight, whether that be for your future spouse or current spouse.
Be Like Minded
This sounds so easy but it can truly be a challenge. Just because you seem to enjoy the same things or meet doing something you like or think is important, it doesn’t always mean that you are like minded. For us there were several things on this list (we each had separate lists we had made prior to even meeting each other) that we both knew neither one of us were going to compromise on. For example, it was important to both of us that Church and our beliefs be the same, it was also important for us that things like jobs and financial security/budgeting were important to us as well as what we wanted out of our futures. Being like minded for us meant finding someone that you were compatible with in the deep root issues but someone who could still push you and grow you in new areas of your life. Alex and I take our faith seriously, we both desire strong careers, we both agree on children and the timing of them, and we both think our families are very important to us, just to name a few things.
Be Humble
One of the things I love most about Alex is his willingness to put my needs and desires way above his own, he does this not only because he loves me but because Christ called him to. I try every day not to take this for granted and to imitate his behavior and consider his needs and desires above my own. This is hard, I have to constantly be in prayer about my own selfishness, but I love and more importantly respect Alex and I realize that our happiness as a couple is dependent upon each of our needs being met. In planning for our future we make sure that we listen to each other first and respect that we will sometimes have differences of opinions or we may want different things but if we honor each other through the process we will be better for it.
Respect
This one is huge for me because coming from my last relationship I realized just how little respect there was for me and my family. I wanted to make sure that I found a man who not only respected himself enough to take care of himself and his friends and family but also one who respected me and my life and my family. God has shown me so many things about His love for me in the way that Alex respects me and my family, each day is another blessing. For Alex and I, respect can be as simple as me allowing him time to do the things that he loves (like play tennis with his friends 2 nights a week, goodness knows he respects me enough to let me train for a marathon) to something as big as us making the decision early on that we wanted to respect each other by not having sex before marriage. Respect is something that is so minuscule, but it speaks volumes.
Share
I love to run; I think that’s pretty obvious. I haven’t always loved to run but it is something that has become very significant in my life and it gives me confidence and joy, so I run, a lot. Alex on the other hand doesn’t really like running, most Saturday mornings I’m up and running 10+ miles before he even thinks about waking up and doing anything for the day. I like to spend my weekends traveling to different races, Alex likes to clean and tinker with his “toys” (aka, electronic stuff I know nothing about). But what ultimately makes our relationship work is for each of us to take interest in what the other person loves to do. It took us a while to find a balance in sharing our passions with each other; initially I had visions of he and I training for Ironmans together on the weekends while he had visions of sitting on the couch and getting his robot working. We have had to slowly learn that some things can be shared but only to a certain extent. He does a much better job at this than I do because quite often he will come with me to races whether he’s running or not. And while I may not be able to help him with his robots I can most definitely ask him about them and listen while he shares his passions with me.
Laugh together
Alex and I both tend to be your more serious, type-A kinds of people; we like plans, schedules, maps, details, information, etc. At times we both have our ideas of “the right way” to accomplish certain things or we both have the “right answer” for a certain problem but underneath all of that we can laugh at each other and make fun of our high maintenance ways. Just the other day we were arguing {discussing, mind you} about our guest list (oh heaven help us, did anyone else have guest list issues?) and it got to the point where I was nearly in tears over the matter. But low and behold Alex makes a light-hearted comment and we are both laughing at the matter. And now we joke about it. Although our guest list does still bring lots of discussion we are now more light-hearted about it and generally laugh and make jokes about our disagreement. At the end of the day we will probably always be serious people but we do know how to make each other laugh and I think that’s so important.
Before I leave I want to give you a passage that has really spoken to me as we have been preparing for our engagement and our wedding and that is Philippians 2:1-18.
Thank you for letting me share and I hope you get a chance to stop on by and say HI!
I have a guest post for you today from Veronica from Adventures of D and V, and she has a great recipe to share with you! Thanks for guest posting for me while we adjust to having another baby around here, Veronica!
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Hi there! I hope you are having a wonderful winter day! While Callie is snuggling her new little girl, I get to share a special (and super easy) recipe with you! But first, let me introduce myself. My name is Veronica. And I am the "V" in the Adventures of D and V. "D" is my best friend and husband Daniel.
About 3 years ago we embarked on a great adventures ~ married life!
We started our little bog to document our every day adventures that we have together.
We have adventures in
and LOTS of
Just to name a few.
Many of our adventures revolve around our little fixer upper house.
We are currently in the middle of "Operation: Finish Basement".
Click {here} to find out more about that!
My favorite room in our whole house is the kitchen!
I have so many good memories in kitchens. I loved watching my mom, grandmas, and great-grandmas cook. I loved when they would let me "help" when I was little. And when I got older they would teach me how they made the most delicious treats for me and my family to enjoy. Now that I have a kitchen of my own, I love making meals for friends and family. You could say that cooking is one of my love languages! Many of the recipes I make have special memories attached to them, which makes the treat all the more special.
Every Christmas my Grandma Seger would make a smorgasbord of different Christmas candies. Special treats that she would only make at Christmas time. Chocolate covered cherries, peanut brittle, and turtles to name a few. All home made. She would package the treats in little boxes. And she took requests to make each box special. My special order was peanut brittle with out the peanuts. (yep, I'm a little weird like that!) Anyway, EVERYONE who knew my Grandma Seger (and even people who didn't know her) hoped each year that they would get a box of this special candy. Sadly, my Grandma Seger passed away this summer {You can read my 10 favorite memories of here HERE}. Now she is in heaven with Jesus, but while she was still here, I got to learn how to make some of her special candies! And today I am going to teach you how to make a family favorite.
All you need is 5 ingredients: 2 c. Rice Krispies, 1 1/2 c. Peanut Butter Captain Crunch, 1/2 can of mixed nuts, 2 c. mini marshmallows, and l package (24 oz.) Vanilla Almond Bark (normally found by the chocolate chips in the baking section of the grocery store).
Step 1: Melt Vanilla Almond Bark.
You can follow the directions on the package. It can be melted in the microwave, on the stove top, or in the oven. My Grandma melted hers in the oven, in a glass baking dish, so I do too. I set the oven to 250 degrees and stir evey 3 minutes or so....
Until it is melted like this
Step 2: Carefully mix in all the other ingredients.
Tip #1 - You kind of need to work fast because as the almond bark cools, it hardens.
Tip #2 - Mix the cereal and nuts in first, add marshmallows last, it helps so the keep their form, you don't want them to melt too much.
Step 3: Use a spoon to scoop golf ball sized clumps of the mixture on to a wax paper lined cookie sheet.
Step 4: Let the clumps cool completely. It should only take 20 minutes of so.
Step 5: Peel off and enjoy!
They are a little salty, a little sweet, a little crunchy, and a little squishy.
Something for everyone!
Do you have any special memories attached to special recipes?
It's the Eve of Christmas today. I've been ready for Christmas for a few weeks now, but somehow it still seems to have snuck up on me. I think it's because I've been so distracted the last few weeks with getting ready not only for Christmas, but for baby.
The whole last month can be summed up in one word for me - expectancy. Will she come early like Wyatt? Will I be able to make it to that party next week, or will I be having a baby? In the back of my mind is always the thought that she could come any time.
All of my energies have been focused on getting every task that arises done as soon as possible, because if that day was the day, I wanted everything to be ready. I wanted to be prepared.
These last few days especially, as her due date has been drawing closer and closer, I've been watching for any sign that she might be coming soon - is that a contraction, or is she just pushing out the side of my belly again? Is that back pain getting worse? When will she come?
This whole month we've also been doing a Scripture advent calendar for Wyatt each night that his sweet aunt and uncle put together for him. And last night, after we read the scraps of paper, divided up the chocolate, and opened Wyatt's last advent present, I started thinking about expectancy again, but this time about the expectancy that preceded Christ's birth.
The Jews knew he was coming. For hundreds of years they read prophesies in the Scriptures about his birth. How must it have felt for Mary and Joseph to know that every prophesy, every hope and longing for His coming, was on the brink of being fulfilled through that tiny human baby (that probably stuck his arms and legs out the side of Mary's belly too)? That all those who had been watching for Him would soon see Him come, just as God said He would?
I'm not sure everyone understood then that He had come not to defeat the Romans, but to defeat something far more damaging to the people God loves - our sin. That he came to live, and then die to pay for the sin of the world, and then to rise again that we might live.
That wasn't what some of them expected, but God had His plan. Still, regardless of what they knew or didn't know about His purpose here then, to have waited for the Messiah so long and then to have Him come must have been something so special.
It's nowhere close to the same type of expectancy, but somehow waiting for our little lady to arrive has made me think about it more. I think about how excited I'll be when all these little aches and pains culminate into something that I can actually identify as labor. I think about how wonderful it'll be to see her little face after all the waiting.
And I think how thrilling it must have been, after generations of waiting, to know that the Messiah was finally here. That must have been the most amazing type of expectancy to have fulfilled for those who had been watching for Him.
It's not quite finished yet though. Jesus is coming again - not as a baby, but to catch us up with Him in the clouds, and to establish His kingdom on earth! There is plenty of controversy about how and when all the events in the end times will happen, but the bottom line is, we know He's coming back.
Are we waiting for Him now with the same kind of expectancy? Are we watching for the signs that He's coming soon? Are we making sure everything in our hearts and lives are ready for Him?
Tomorrow, as I think about the first time He came, I want to remember to watch for Him still. I want to be ready for Him, and I want to experience that full measure of joy when He finally comes again, because I was watching for Him and expecting Him all along.
Just like the waiting for anything makes it so much sweeter to receive it, for those who are waiting, and watching, and longing for His coming again, it will be a thrill beyond anything else to hear that trumpet sound and know that He is here.
To wrap it up, this song kept playing in my head as I wrote this - it's not technically a Christmas song, but it fits - because what a glorious day it will be when He comes again!
One day when Heaven was filled with His praises
One day when sin was as black as could be
Jesus came forth to be born of a virgin
Dwelt among men, my example is He.
One day they led Him up Calvary's mountain
One day they nailed Him to die on a tree
Suffering anguish, despised and rejected
Bearing our sins, my Redeemer is He.
One day the grave could conceal Him no longer
One day the stone rolled away from the door
Then He arose, over death He had conquered
Now He's ascended, my Lord evermore.
One day the trumpet will sound for His coming,
One day the skies with His glory will shine;
Wonderful day, my beloved ones bringing;
Glorious Savior, this Jesus is mine!
Living, He loved me
Dying, He saved me
Buried, He carried my sins far away
Rising, He justified freely forever
One day He's coming
Oh glorious day!
-J. Wilbur Chapman
Merry Christmas, Friends! Praying you may have the joy of knowing and waiting for Him too!
This day before Thanksgiving I'm . . .
. . . making sweet potato casserole. The best Thanksgiving dish ever. At least I kind of think so.
. . . making deviled eggs too. With paprika. Because it's just not pretty without paprika.
. . . hoping Derek and I can resist the temptation to eat aforementioned Thanksgiving Day fare before tomorrow.
. . . cleaning my messy house, or at least attempting to, because I have this thing about my house being clean on holidays.
. . . filing away the last of the photos from Wyatt's first year in a photo album - and maybe I'll get a start on his second year.
. . . starting a project for Baby Girl's room to organize the headbands I plan to buy and/or make her.
. . . thinking it might be a good day to try to watch our childbirth video with Derek as a review.
. . . forming my Black Friday game plan. Which includes buying a new vacuum since ours broke.
. . . thinking it's pretty cool that our church does a Thanksgiving Day service, and wondering if we can go tomorrow if we strategize.
. . . planning for the weekend, when we get out our Christmas decorations.
And this day before Thanksgiving I'm thinking how thankful I am that . . .
. . . sweet potatoes and eggs exist, and we are blessed to be able to afford them.
. . . I have a wonderful husband to swat away from the food.
. . . we have a roof over our heads (and over our messiness).
. . . we've been blessed with our precious son for almost two years now, and for all the memories in the photos.
. . . I have a Baby Girl to buy headbands for, and decorate a nursery for, and dream about.
. . . this pregnancy has been so healthy and uneventful so far, and that my family is healthy.
. . . my vacuum broke right before Black Friday. Could I ask for better timing? I think not!
. . . we live in a country where we are free to gather and worship God as we please.
. . . the reason we decorate for Christmas in the first place is because we're celebrating the fact that God became a baby, Who grew into a man, Who died on the cross to pay for our sins, and Who rose to life again. Who is coming again someday.
Today I'm reminded of everything I've been given, and I thank God for it. And I thank Him for who He is. Because He is good.
So I officially finished the crib bedding for baby girl! Eventually I will post pictures of the nursery so you can see it all together, but for today I'll show you all the quilt.
The finished product! It was really hard to take that second picture by the way - I had to stand on a chair and hold the camera above my head. I need to be taller I guess!
I had no idea what colors I wanted gong into the fabric store - whether I wanted to be traditional or go for an unexpected color scheme. But in the end I put all these fabrics together and loved it, so muted pinks, purples, gold, and white it was. I think it was a good way to go in the end, because with all the different shades of pink and purple, I haven't had too much trouble finding crib sheets and decor items to go with the color scheme!
I got the idea for the pattern for the quilt from a design by Hillary Lang in this book:
It was a pretty simple patten to follow - basically you start out with a base piece, cut out a bunch of squares, arrange them on the base piece, then pin them into place and sew with an appliqué stitch around all the edges. I changed it up a little bit from what the book suggested and added the borders around the edges, with the pieces overlapping onto the border.
One of the out-takes from my attempt at getting a picture of the whole quilt, but you can see the edge better in this one.
One thing I might do differently if I were to do this quilt again would be to place the pieces one at a time and sew them down before adding more squares on top. The advantage to doing it that way would be that the pieces would all lay flat - it was hard to keep all the pieces exactly in place while I was sewing, since I don't have a quilting table, so some of them ended up a little puckered.
The disadvantage to doing it that way though would be that you can't really get a full picture of the placement before you start sewing, which is why they probably suggest to arrange all the pieces from the start. And I'm happy with the way it turned out, puckers and all - it may not be perfect, but a lot of love went into it, and that's the whole point of making my baby girl a quilt myself.
When I make baby quilts I like to pick simple designs with large squares - I'm not a die-hard quilter, not yet anyway, and I need something that I can start and finish rather quickly. This quilt probably took me probably 10-15 hours all together maybe? Including cutting the pieces. I don't think that's bad for a quilt.
I did not, in fact, do the actual quilting part myself - once I had it pieced together I took the back, front, and batting over to my old neighbor, Debbie, who has a professional quilting business and a big, fancy machine to do it with, so she did that part. If I didn't have Debbie to do the fancy quilting for me, I'd probably just tack it down in several places or do simple lines instead.
I love the meander that Debbie picked by the way - see the little hearts in the stitching? It's perfect!
When I got it back I did the biding around the edges by just rolling a bit of the backing around the the front, then pinning it and sewing in place.
And that's it! I also made a crib skirt to go with it, and I'll show you all of it together once we have Mr. Wyatt transferred over to his toddler bed and I get the crib set up!
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