1 day ago
Showing posts with label Guest Post. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Guest Post. Show all posts
It was a little over a year ago now that I sat down and actually watched one of the videos from the Center For Medical Progress. Up to that point I had just read articles about the videos, describing the callous behavior and illegal actions of Planned Parenthood officials.
But for some reason, that day I decided to click open the video and watch myself. I watched an interview with an abortion worker. Then the video changed, and they were walking into a lab. And I put my hand over my eyes and peeked through every now and then. I saw a bloody tray. I saw the backs of Planned Parenthood employees as they worked.
And I peeked through my fingers and felt my baby kick right under my heart as one of them proclaimed "it's a boy!".
That baby boy would have been born a couple weeks after Clarice.
The tears started then, rolling down my cheeks as my girl rolled over in my womb. I cried for that baby boy, whom some have named Emmett, who never had a chance to kick his mama, or cry, or laugh, or have a first birthday, or start kindergarten. I cried for that mother, who will never know the joy he might have brought into her life.
I still want to throw up just thinking about it, and even though I have been pro-life as long as I've known about such things, I knew it was time to stop pretending this wasn't happening. It was time to stop forgetting about it unless it was an election year.
So a few months later, on New Year's Eve, I made a secret resolution. This was the year I'd get involved. This was the year I'd do something.
You'll see me talking a bit more about my pro-life beliefs on here as I get my thoughts together. I have a post with ideas on different things you can do, including telling you a little bit more about the shirt I'm wearing (hint: donate here), but today I wanted to share one way I've tried to get involved in stopping abortion - volunteering with a pregnancy resource center. It hasn't looked like I thought it would, and I have a bit of advice for those of you who have considered volunteering yourselves.
Head over to the Save The Storks blog to read about the one thing you should know before you offer to volunteer at your local pregnancy center!
Head over to the Save The Storks blog to read about the one thing you should know before you offer to volunteer at your local pregnancy center!
"We're having a baby!"
As those words fell joyfully from my sister's lips, I began a journey that has been one of my most treasured aspects of my life. I gained a title before my name and it changed my world.
"You get to have all the fun of kids and at the end of the night you get to give them back!"
This is the tongue in cheek attitude towards being an aunt that everyone talks about,
but there is so much more that no one ever discusses.
I am a mother who works. I didn’t intend to end up this way, but I didn’t avoid it, either. I never spent a lot of time deciding whether I should stay at home exclusively or split my time between chasing little kids at home and caring for sick ones in the hospital. Yet that is where I find myself, and I’m learning more about motherhood through my work than I ever realized.
I was lucky to find my way into the nursing profession, mostly as a skill to use working overseas. While my husband and I worked in Cambodia with a nonprofit for three years, we decided to have a go at parenting. We gave birth to our son, and I stayed home with him for the next eight months, until we moved back to the States. There really wasn’t another option. Daycare doesn’t exist in Cambodia, and I wanted those precious first months with him.
Despite growing up a full-on Alabama Southern Belle, I never fantasized about my future wedding or played with baby dolls. I grew up with boy cousins and preferred to play outdoors. In my teens, I opted for waitress and desk jobs over babysitting. The thought of really getting married one day never entered my mind until I became serious about my husband in college.
I loved children, but not babies. This became more evident as years passed and all my friends started having babies. I relied on the Boppy® pillow to help me cradle the fragile life that was plopped in my lap whenever I visited a new mom. The scared and awkward look on my face revealed to my friend (and all of social media) that I was not comfortable with a newborn.
Your Husband Isn't Your College Roommate (And 4 Other Things I Never Knew About Marriage) | A Guest Post
Cards on the table: I don’t write this post as a sage, old, married woman. My husband and I are inching closer to our three year anniversary; a lifetime to go and countless lessons more to learn. Even still, if you’ve been married for over 24 hours you’ll know that this sacred union isn’t easy. Sometimes it’s downright hard. Difficult. Devastating. Sometimes marriage drives you to consuming a tub of ice cream alone on your couch, watching Love, Actually and wondering, “Why doesn’t he act like that?” (A purely hypothetical situation, you understand.)
I like to think of myself as a "life long learner". That phrase was first introduced to me in a 100 level education class when I was a freshman at Wheaton College. I have always love learning - and the more I learn the more I realize I have yet to learn. So, when I became a mom a little over a year ago, I knew that there were lots of things I was going to be learning. One area I was surprised that I needed to learn about was friendship. I thought I had the making-and-maintaining-friendships thing down pretty good...but it turns out that there were a few things I needed to learn and re-learn during this past year.
Things I never knew about friendship...
Since I am off enjoying sun, dirt and campfires with the family this week, I asked one of my dear blog friends, Natalie, to share a guest post with you guys! Natalie is a blogger at She Builds Her Home, and she is a mama to two adorable little girls - and her family is in the process of adopting another sweet baby! I love reading her tips on adopting, homemaking, marriage, and motherhood.
Natalie is going to share some tips for ways to bless new moms, and I found myself nodding my head to all her tips - especially the last one! Moms, please add your own experiences or tips at the end. We'd both love to read what you found helpful after having your baby(ies)!
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I've been that mom twice. The one who just had a baby, is tired, is sore, is hungry, is emotional. If you haven't been in those shoes (or sometimes even if you have!) it is hard to know what will bless her the most. What will help her, what will make her feel most loved, what will make her life a little bit easier. So I've compiled a list of some of the things I think would most bless a brand new mom with a little one(s).
1. Text, don't call her. New moms never know what's going to be happening when. If they're trying to figure out breastfeeding, or simply cuddling their baby, they won't have an extra hand to talk on the phone. They might be sleeping at 2 p.m. - you don't want to be the guy that wakes them up! A text will give them the freedom to respond when it is convenient for them and not feel pressured to answer the phone or call you right back.
2. Bring their family a meal. Try to make this as easy on them as possible by bringing disposable containers so they don't have to wash and return them to you. If they are getting multiple meals it may be hard for them to remember which ones belong to which people.
3. Offer to stop by and bring her something. Anything. Maybe she needs more diapers, maybe she wants Starbucks, or maybe she needs stool softeners - ha! I didn't say it will be glamorous, but just ask her what she needs. Getting out of the house to run to the store with a 4 day old is hard. She'll appreciate the offer.
4. Lend an ear. Ask her if she wants to talk. Maybe she will, maybe she won't. If she does, be prepared that she might make no sense at all. She might tell you that she actually misses her baby so much it physically hurts (you know, the baby she is holding at the moment she says that). She might cry about how she feels so skinny and fat at the exact same time. Maybe she'll even confess that as tired as she is, she can't sleep because she can't stop staring at that beautiful creation and wondering how it belongs to her. Whatever it is she tells you - be supportive. Laugh with her, cry with her, hug her (if she wants a hug), just be there for her.
5. Ask how you can help her around the house. Let her know you're willing to take and do her laundry, scrub her dishes, or clean her bathroom. Those things are probably at the bottom of her to do list. They come after: feed the baby, snuggle the baby, feed the baby, change the baby, snuggle the baby, snuggle the baby, feed the baby, nap, eat, feed the baby, change the baby, snuggle the baby........
6. Send her a card, a care package or just an email/text with no agenda. Just to say 'hey, I'm thinking about you and you're rocking this mom thing!' Don't expect a response, a thank you card, or anything else - just do it to let her know she is doing a great job!
7. Offer (with no pressure) to come and hold/rock the baby while she takes a nap or shower. Sometimes new moms feel like they just physically cannot put the baby down because the time is so fleeting. Don't be offended if she says NO WAY!
8. If she has other kids, ask her how you can help out with them. Could you take them to the park? Maybe to the library? Maybe you could even just come over and cook lunch for them while she focuses on the baby for an hour or two.
9. Give her some space and don't take things personally. A lot of new moms have tons of scary emotions going on. I bawled 10 times a day because I loved my babies so much, and that scared me because no one told me it would happen. I wanted it to just be me and my family in a bubble for awhile and some people were offended by that. Don't be. Try to understand that this is precious time for them!
10. When you come to visit the new baby or bring a meal (not when you come to help out), don't linger. She will probably be un-showered, her house will be messy and she'll have a baby attached to her chest. She probably won't feel like entertaining guests. Drop off the meal, tell her how beautiful her baby is and don't stay longer than 30 minutes tops.
Mamas-what else would you add?
Natalie is going to share some tips for ways to bless new moms, and I found myself nodding my head to all her tips - especially the last one! Moms, please add your own experiences or tips at the end. We'd both love to read what you found helpful after having your baby(ies)!
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I've been that mom twice. The one who just had a baby, is tired, is sore, is hungry, is emotional. If you haven't been in those shoes (or sometimes even if you have!) it is hard to know what will bless her the most. What will help her, what will make her feel most loved, what will make her life a little bit easier. So I've compiled a list of some of the things I think would most bless a brand new mom with a little one(s).
1. Text, don't call her. New moms never know what's going to be happening when. If they're trying to figure out breastfeeding, or simply cuddling their baby, they won't have an extra hand to talk on the phone. They might be sleeping at 2 p.m. - you don't want to be the guy that wakes them up! A text will give them the freedom to respond when it is convenient for them and not feel pressured to answer the phone or call you right back.
2. Bring their family a meal. Try to make this as easy on them as possible by bringing disposable containers so they don't have to wash and return them to you. If they are getting multiple meals it may be hard for them to remember which ones belong to which people.
3. Offer to stop by and bring her something. Anything. Maybe she needs more diapers, maybe she wants Starbucks, or maybe she needs stool softeners - ha! I didn't say it will be glamorous, but just ask her what she needs. Getting out of the house to run to the store with a 4 day old is hard. She'll appreciate the offer.
5. Ask how you can help her around the house. Let her know you're willing to take and do her laundry, scrub her dishes, or clean her bathroom. Those things are probably at the bottom of her to do list. They come after: feed the baby, snuggle the baby, feed the baby, change the baby, snuggle the baby, snuggle the baby, feed the baby, nap, eat, feed the baby, change the baby, snuggle the baby........
{^^ those moments? WAY more important than house work.}
6. Send her a card, a care package or just an email/text with no agenda. Just to say 'hey, I'm thinking about you and you're rocking this mom thing!' Don't expect a response, a thank you card, or anything else - just do it to let her know she is doing a great job!
7. Offer (with no pressure) to come and hold/rock the baby while she takes a nap or shower. Sometimes new moms feel like they just physically cannot put the baby down because the time is so fleeting. Don't be offended if she says NO WAY!
8. If she has other kids, ask her how you can help out with them. Could you take them to the park? Maybe to the library? Maybe you could even just come over and cook lunch for them while she focuses on the baby for an hour or two.
9. Give her some space and don't take things personally. A lot of new moms have tons of scary emotions going on. I bawled 10 times a day because I loved my babies so much, and that scared me because no one told me it would happen. I wanted it to just be me and my family in a bubble for awhile and some people were offended by that. Don't be. Try to understand that this is precious time for them!
10. When you come to visit the new baby or bring a meal (not when you come to help out), don't linger. She will probably be un-showered, her house will be messy and she'll have a baby attached to her chest. She probably won't feel like entertaining guests. Drop off the meal, tell her how beautiful her baby is and don't stay longer than 30 minutes tops.
Mamas-what else would you add?
Laura from The B Family Blog was kind enough to write a guest post for me while I figure out this being-a-mom-of-two thing, and I was so excited when she told me she was going to write about her testimony! I love reading stories of how people come to know Jesus, and Laura's is a cool story that can only be attributed to the Lord "nudging" her, if you will. Thank you so much for sharing your story and guest posting for me Laura!
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Hi! I’m Laura and I blog over at The B Family Blog. I’m excited to guest post for Callie while she is busy snuggling the newest addition to her beautiful family. A little about me, I’m a wife to an amazing man, Joe and mommy to the light of my life, Olivia. I’m 29 years young and a (new) lover of Jesus. Here’s a little bit about my journey to finding the Lord.
July 11, 2012 is a day that really changed my life, the CORE of mine and my family’s lives. On July 11, 2012 I accepted the Lord as my savior and became a Christian. First, I guess I should back up! I grew up in a (non-practicing) Roman Catholic household. My family fulfilled the minimum requirements so I could be baptized, make my 1st communion and confirmation. That was it, no more church for us. Rarely any talk of God in our home other than before meal prayers on major holidays, obligatory things, if you will.
In 2010, my husband and I got married and were expecting a baby girl all in the same year. Once Olivia was born, we baptized her at the urging of our family but something just didn’t feel right. After her baptism we never went back to church. A year and a half later I began to feel a nudge from God. I discussed how I was feeling with my husband and he too agreed that something was missing. That following weekend we decided we’d do some ‘church shopping’. Right near where we said “I Do” is a fairly large church that always has a ton of cars in their parking lot every Sunday morning. That was our first stop… and we never left.
When we walked into the church that Sunday morning we were immediately greeted and made to feel welcome. We were showed the nursery and ushered to a seat, a seat that is now our home every Sunday. When the service started everyone stood and the music was so joyful and beautiful. Everyone there was praising Him and it was such an amazing moment to be a part of. Tears stung my eyes as I felt the Holy Spirit working within me, telling me this was it, this was where I was meant to be.
I spoke with a woman, who is now my ‘mentor’ after the service and she invited me to participate in a discipleship program with her to learn more about Christianity, their beliefs and help me grow in my relationship with Jesus. I accepted and have been meeting with her weekly since July. We talk about real life, how to glorify Him in everything I do, how to pray, how to be a Godly wife and mother…the list goes on and on. She’s truly been such an important part of my salvation and I’m so thankful that God put her in my life at that moment.
Finding the Lord has truly changed my life for the better. My marriage has improved, my parenting has gotten better, my desire to do good has changed, all because of Him. I’m still learning and very, very new at this so I make tons of mistakes and need help praying and growing in my faith but knowing that I serve a forgiving God who loves unconditionally has made all the difference in my life.
Callie – congratulations on your sweet baby girl. Thank you for sharing your blog with me and letting me share my heart!
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Hi! I’m Laura and I blog over at The B Family Blog. I’m excited to guest post for Callie while she is busy snuggling the newest addition to her beautiful family. A little about me, I’m a wife to an amazing man, Joe and mommy to the light of my life, Olivia. I’m 29 years young and a (new) lover of Jesus. Here’s a little bit about my journey to finding the Lord.
July 11, 2012 is a day that really changed my life, the CORE of mine and my family’s lives. On July 11, 2012 I accepted the Lord as my savior and became a Christian. First, I guess I should back up! I grew up in a (non-practicing) Roman Catholic household. My family fulfilled the minimum requirements so I could be baptized, make my 1st communion and confirmation. That was it, no more church for us. Rarely any talk of God in our home other than before meal prayers on major holidays, obligatory things, if you will.
In 2010, my husband and I got married and were expecting a baby girl all in the same year. Once Olivia was born, we baptized her at the urging of our family but something just didn’t feel right. After her baptism we never went back to church. A year and a half later I began to feel a nudge from God. I discussed how I was feeling with my husband and he too agreed that something was missing. That following weekend we decided we’d do some ‘church shopping’. Right near where we said “I Do” is a fairly large church that always has a ton of cars in their parking lot every Sunday morning. That was our first stop… and we never left.
When we walked into the church that Sunday morning we were immediately greeted and made to feel welcome. We were showed the nursery and ushered to a seat, a seat that is now our home every Sunday. When the service started everyone stood and the music was so joyful and beautiful. Everyone there was praising Him and it was such an amazing moment to be a part of. Tears stung my eyes as I felt the Holy Spirit working within me, telling me this was it, this was where I was meant to be.
I spoke with a woman, who is now my ‘mentor’ after the service and she invited me to participate in a discipleship program with her to learn more about Christianity, their beliefs and help me grow in my relationship with Jesus. I accepted and have been meeting with her weekly since July. We talk about real life, how to glorify Him in everything I do, how to pray, how to be a Godly wife and mother…the list goes on and on. She’s truly been such an important part of my salvation and I’m so thankful that God put her in my life at that moment.
Finding the Lord has truly changed my life for the better. My marriage has improved, my parenting has gotten better, my desire to do good has changed, all because of Him. I’m still learning and very, very new at this so I make tons of mistakes and need help praying and growing in my faith but knowing that I serve a forgiving God who loves unconditionally has made all the difference in my life.
Callie – congratulations on your sweet baby girl. Thank you for sharing your blog with me and letting me share my heart!
Today I'm sharing a guest post from my long-time blog friend, Katie from State of Change! I asked Katie to post about balancing blogging and motherhood because we've had a few conversations about finding that "balance". I think she has some great things to say, so read on! Thanks, Katie, for guest posting for me!
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Hey Through Clouded Glass readers! I'm happy to be entertaining you today while our Callie is off smelling sweet baby hair and learning more about being a mama to a little girl. I'm going to write today on something that I'm sure you have heard brought up a thousand times in the blogosphere: the balance of blogging.
How do you balance maintaining a blog and also a home?
How do you spend the golden amount of time on your blog to grow it and also help some little kids to grow?
How do you spend time with your family, have dinner on the table, have a clean home, catch up with friends, and have a blog post scheduled for the same time every day?
My answer to that? You don't. At least, I don't.
I know there are plenty of people who have a formula. Stay up late. Blog X Number of Hours during the day divided between naps and after the kids are in bed. Set aside a big chunk of time on the weekend. But you know what? That just doesn't work for me.
I feel like those things put my blog as the priority. It makes it seem like in order to thrive I have to set aside time for my blog. I have to help my little blog business grow. I need that time. When truth is, I don't.
I need to love and care for my children. I need to cherish my husband and our time together. I need to make sure that I've done the laundry so that we have clothes for the next day and I don't have to wear my old maternity pants to Target (not that this has ever happened...ahem...).
Sure, there are things that need to get done. But in my life, blogging should be on the want list rather than the need list. I want to write. It is a way for my soul to breathe. I always want it to be that way, and I know that I don't want it to become strictly an obligation. I also know what should be getting the greatest amount of my time, energy, and focus isn't a space on the internet, it is this:
In a way, instead of worrying too much about balance, I treasure a little bit of imbalance.
Do you have a blogging balance? Or do you embrace the imbalance?
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Hey Through Clouded Glass readers! I'm happy to be entertaining you today while our Callie is off smelling sweet baby hair and learning more about being a mama to a little girl. I'm going to write today on something that I'm sure you have heard brought up a thousand times in the blogosphere: the balance of blogging.
How do you balance maintaining a blog and also a home?
How do you spend the golden amount of time on your blog to grow it and also help some little kids to grow?
How do you spend time with your family, have dinner on the table, have a clean home, catch up with friends, and have a blog post scheduled for the same time every day?
My answer to that? You don't. At least, I don't.
I know there are plenty of people who have a formula. Stay up late. Blog X Number of Hours during the day divided between naps and after the kids are in bed. Set aside a big chunk of time on the weekend. But you know what? That just doesn't work for me.
I feel like those things put my blog as the priority. It makes it seem like in order to thrive I have to set aside time for my blog. I have to help my little blog business grow. I need that time. When truth is, I don't.
I need to love and care for my children. I need to cherish my husband and our time together. I need to make sure that I've done the laundry so that we have clothes for the next day and I don't have to wear my old maternity pants to Target (not that this has ever happened...ahem...).
Sure, there are things that need to get done. But in my life, blogging should be on the want list rather than the need list. I want to write. It is a way for my soul to breathe. I always want it to be that way, and I know that I don't want it to become strictly an obligation. I also know what should be getting the greatest amount of my time, energy, and focus isn't a space on the internet, it is this:
In a way, instead of worrying too much about balance, I treasure a little bit of imbalance.
Do you have a blogging balance? Or do you embrace the imbalance?
Today I have a guest post written by Leslie at Did You Hear About The Morgans?! Leslie is going to talk about marriage today and how she has incorporated a 101 in 1001 list into that - it's a great idea, I think! Read on to get all the details, and thanks Leslie for guest posting for me while I adjust to having two kiddos!
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A few months back I started reading a little ole blog called Through Clouded Glass written by Callie. ;-)
I have no idea how I found it but I did and I love it. I connect with Callie so much because she is a Christian wife and a mom. I'm two of the three and hope to be 3/3 one day in the future. I was honored when Callie said she would like for me to write a guest post for her blog so HERE GOES!
I'm Leslie Morgan and I blog over at Did YOU Hear about the Morgans? I have been married to my husband, Matt, since 1/1/11. We live in Spartanburg, SC. I'm a Speech Language Pathologist and Matt works at The Home Depot and is a Photographer as well! We love our little life and are just chasing our dreams.
Matt and I have a great relationship. We enjoy traveling together and doing other fun things together. Because of that, we decided to do a 101 in 1001 list TOGETHER. Well, let's be honest, it was my idea but when I mentioned it to Matt he was all for it. I was thrilled because I knew it would be a great relationship builder and fun at the same time.
We made our list together of 51 goals and then we each made 25 individual goals. Y'all, it was hard to come up with 101 goals. We wanted them to be achievable obviously BUT not just easy peasy goals either. Since we got married on New Year's Day we decided that our first anniversary and the first of the year would be the perfect day to start! The end date is September 28th, 2014.
You can link here to find our most updated list and all of the goals we have met.
Some of our favorites have been....
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A few months back I started reading a little ole blog called Through Clouded Glass written by Callie. ;-)
I have no idea how I found it but I did and I love it. I connect with Callie so much because she is a Christian wife and a mom. I'm two of the three and hope to be 3/3 one day in the future. I was honored when Callie said she would like for me to write a guest post for her blog so HERE GOES!
I'm Leslie Morgan and I blog over at Did YOU Hear about the Morgans? I have been married to my husband, Matt, since 1/1/11. We live in Spartanburg, SC. I'm a Speech Language Pathologist and Matt works at The Home Depot and is a Photographer as well! We love our little life and are just chasing our dreams.
Matt and I have a great relationship. We enjoy traveling together and doing other fun things together. Because of that, we decided to do a 101 in 1001 list TOGETHER. Well, let's be honest, it was my idea but when I mentioned it to Matt he was all for it. I was thrilled because I knew it would be a great relationship builder and fun at the same time.
We made our list together of 51 goals and then we each made 25 individual goals. Y'all, it was hard to come up with 101 goals. We wanted them to be achievable obviously BUT not just easy peasy goals either. Since we got married on New Year's Day we decided that our first anniversary and the first of the year would be the perfect day to start! The end date is September 28th, 2014.
Side note: We chose a 101 in 1001 list because it was over a longer period of time but not too long. Also, it goes throughout each season several times so if there are a couple of "big" things that we can only do in certain seasons, we have time to do them all!
You can link here to find our most updated list and all of the goals we have met.
Some of our favorites have been....
-Sell something on Etsy---We have become a little crafty mostly out of necessity at first and then for fun! We have sold 7 items so far. We have been super busy with other aspects of life so we have no sold much in a while but plan to get back to it in the new year.
-Visit the Biltmore---We did this in August when my Mom was in town! SUCH A BLAST! If you live local or visit the Asheville area, you must see it!
-Start a small business----We have actually done this TWICE. Matt started his photography business and I have started a Scentsy business. We are still on the ground floor of both but it's so fun.
-(one of my goals) Find a yummy Low Country Boil recipe and make it---Delicious, I tell you! This was a a good goal.
-(one of Matt's goals) Take Leslie to an Air Show---The Mr. grew up with his Dad in the AF so they loved Air Shows and until we met, I didn't even know what they were! We went this past summer and it was so fun. Hope to do it again some day.
So there you have it, our 101 in 1001 list. Guys, this has been one of the most rewarding things we have done in our short 2 years of marriage. If you are looking for a way to reconnect and/or just grow in your marriage, I think this is a good way to do just that!
Thanks for reading! Come check out our blog sometime and Keep Callie and her family in your thoughts and prayers as they enjoy their time as a family of 4!
P.S. If you have any questions about a 101 in 1001 list, let me know. Also, if you're interested in Scentsy, check out my site :)
Today I'm sharing a guest post from Lauren over at The Unlikely Runners, as she talks about her relationship with her fiancé (congratulations again Lauren!), and choosing a spouse. Thanks for guest posting for me, Lauren!
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Hi! I’m Lauren and I blog over at The Unlikely Runners. Most of the time you can find me talking about running, working out, healthy eating, fitness and marathon training, but I just recently got engaged so now you will often find posts that document my adventures with my fiancé, Alex. When Callie first asked for people to volunteer as guest posters I was a little hesitant; I am not married {yet} and I don’t have kids {yet}, so I really didn’t fall into the category of her main readers. However, I feel like God has blessed me in so many ways over the last 2 years of my life and I just couldn’t pass up an opportunity to share with you how He has worked in me.
You see, a little over 2 years ago I was living in a place that I knew God was not happy with; I had made many poor choices in my life through college and I ended up in a marriage that was detrimental to me and my family as well as living a life with no real career path and no focus or motivation. I grew up attending church and I was surrounded by Christian morals my whole life, but during this time in my life I lost many friends and hurt many family members and I hurt myself in a lot of ways too. But God is faithful in all ways.
My then husband made some very, very poor choices and it eventually led to our divorce; a divorce that was painful at the time but a true blessing in disguise from God. It was at this point that I was able to experience true, unending love from my Heavenly Father. He gave me family, He gave me new friends and a new church and He gave me the therapy of running, all of this leading to a healing process that I am still in awe of.
Fast forward to one year after my divorce and God brings a wonderful, Godly man to the single’s group at my church. His name was Alex. After several months of hanging out with Alex within the boundaries of our single’s ministry and after much persuasion from a friend I agreed to meet him for coffee, just to talk! I had no intentions of dating anyone, I was very happily single, I was enjoying my job and my friends and running races was my passion. But God clearly had other plans for me, and I’m so glad that He did.
One year and 15 days after we officially started dating Alex asked me to marry him! We are planning a Memorial Day weekend wedding in Texas and I have never been happier in my life.
But why do I tell you all of this? While I am no expert at relationships and while I clearly don’t have all the answers I did want to share with you some things that God has taught me about relationships, specifically in how to chose a proper spouse, in hopes that you might take on some new insight, whether that be for your future spouse or current spouse.
Be Like Minded
This sounds so easy but it can truly be a challenge. Just because you seem to enjoy the same things or meet doing something you like or think is important, it doesn’t always mean that you are like minded. For us there were several things on this list (we each had separate lists we had made prior to even meeting each other) that we both knew neither one of us were going to compromise on. For example, it was important to both of us that Church and our beliefs be the same, it was also important for us that things like jobs and financial security/budgeting were important to us as well as what we wanted out of our futures. Being like minded for us meant finding someone that you were compatible with in the deep root issues but someone who could still push you and grow you in new areas of your life. Alex and I take our faith seriously, we both desire strong careers, we both agree on children and the timing of them, and we both think our families are very important to us, just to name a few things.
Be Humble
One of the things I love most about Alex is his willingness to put my needs and desires way above his own, he does this not only because he loves me but because Christ called him to. I try every day not to take this for granted and to imitate his behavior and consider his needs and desires above my own. This is hard, I have to constantly be in prayer about my own selfishness, but I love and more importantly respect Alex and I realize that our happiness as a couple is dependent upon each of our needs being met. In planning for our future we make sure that we listen to each other first and respect that we will sometimes have differences of opinions or we may want different things but if we honor each other through the process we will be better for it.
Respect
This one is huge for me because coming from my last relationship I realized just how little respect there was for me and my family. I wanted to make sure that I found a man who not only respected himself enough to take care of himself and his friends and family but also one who respected me and my life and my family. God has shown me so many things about His love for me in the way that Alex respects me and my family, each day is another blessing. For Alex and I, respect can be as simple as me allowing him time to do the things that he loves (like play tennis with his friends 2 nights a week, goodness knows he respects me enough to let me train for a marathon) to something as big as us making the decision early on that we wanted to respect each other by not having sex before marriage. Respect is something that is so minuscule, but it speaks volumes.
Share
I love to run; I think that’s pretty obvious. I haven’t always loved to run but it is something that has become very significant in my life and it gives me confidence and joy, so I run, a lot. Alex on the other hand doesn’t really like running, most Saturday mornings I’m up and running 10+ miles before he even thinks about waking up and doing anything for the day. I like to spend my weekends traveling to different races, Alex likes to clean and tinker with his “toys” (aka, electronic stuff I know nothing about). But what ultimately makes our relationship work is for each of us to take interest in what the other person loves to do. It took us a while to find a balance in sharing our passions with each other; initially I had visions of he and I training for Ironmans together on the weekends while he had visions of sitting on the couch and getting his robot working. We have had to slowly learn that some things can be shared but only to a certain extent. He does a much better job at this than I do because quite often he will come with me to races whether he’s running or not. And while I may not be able to help him with his robots I can most definitely ask him about them and listen while he shares his passions with me.
Laugh together
Alex and I both tend to be your more serious, type-A kinds of people; we like plans, schedules, maps, details, information, etc. At times we both have our ideas of “the right way” to accomplish certain things or we both have the “right answer” for a certain problem but underneath all of that we can laugh at each other and make fun of our high maintenance ways. Just the other day we were arguing {discussing, mind you} about our guest list (oh heaven help us, did anyone else have guest list issues?) and it got to the point where I was nearly in tears over the matter. But low and behold Alex makes a light-hearted comment and we are both laughing at the matter. And now we joke about it. Although our guest list does still bring lots of discussion we are now more light-hearted about it and generally laugh and make jokes about our disagreement. At the end of the day we will probably always be serious people but we do know how to make each other laugh and I think that’s so important.
Before I leave I want to give you a passage that has really spoken to me as we have been preparing for our engagement and our wedding and that is Philippians 2:1-18.
Thank you for letting me share and I hope you get a chance to stop on by and say HI!
I have a guest post for you today from Veronica from Adventures of D and V, and she has a great recipe to share with you! Thanks for guest posting for me while we adjust to having another baby around here, Veronica!
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Hi there! I hope you are having a wonderful winter day! While Callie is snuggling her new little girl, I get to share a special (and super easy) recipe with you! But first, let me introduce myself. My name is Veronica. And I am the "V" in the Adventures of D and V. "D" is my best friend and husband Daniel.
About 3 years ago we embarked on a great adventures ~ married life!
We started our little bog to document our every day adventures that we have together.
We have adventures in
and LOTS of
Just to name a few.
Many of our adventures revolve around our little fixer upper house.
We are currently in the middle of "Operation: Finish Basement".
Click {here} to find out more about that!
My favorite room in our whole house is the kitchen!
I have so many good memories in kitchens. I loved watching my mom, grandmas, and great-grandmas cook. I loved when they would let me "help" when I was little. And when I got older they would teach me how they made the most delicious treats for me and my family to enjoy. Now that I have a kitchen of my own, I love making meals for friends and family. You could say that cooking is one of my love languages! Many of the recipes I make have special memories attached to them, which makes the treat all the more special.
Every Christmas my Grandma Seger would make a smorgasbord of different Christmas candies. Special treats that she would only make at Christmas time. Chocolate covered cherries, peanut brittle, and turtles to name a few. All home made. She would package the treats in little boxes. And she took requests to make each box special. My special order was peanut brittle with out the peanuts. (yep, I'm a little weird like that!) Anyway, EVERYONE who knew my Grandma Seger (and even people who didn't know her) hoped each year that they would get a box of this special candy. Sadly, my Grandma Seger passed away this summer {You can read my 10 favorite memories of here HERE}. Now she is in heaven with Jesus, but while she was still here, I got to learn how to make some of her special candies! And today I am going to teach you how to make a family favorite.
All you need is 5 ingredients: 2 c. Rice Krispies, 1 1/2 c. Peanut Butter Captain Crunch, 1/2 can of mixed nuts, 2 c. mini marshmallows, and l package (24 oz.) Vanilla Almond Bark (normally found by the chocolate chips in the baking section of the grocery store).
Step 1: Melt Vanilla Almond Bark.
You can follow the directions on the package. It can be melted in the microwave, on the stove top, or in the oven. My Grandma melted hers in the oven, in a glass baking dish, so I do too. I set the oven to 250 degrees and stir evey 3 minutes or so....
Until it is melted like this
Step 2: Carefully mix in all the other ingredients.
Tip #1 - You kind of need to work fast because as the almond bark cools, it hardens.
Tip #2 - Mix the cereal and nuts in first, add marshmallows last, it helps so the keep their form, you don't want them to melt too much.
Step 3: Use a spoon to scoop golf ball sized clumps of the mixture on to a wax paper lined cookie sheet.
Step 4: Let the clumps cool completely. It should only take 20 minutes of so.
Step 5: Peel off and enjoy!
They are a little salty, a little sweet, a little crunchy, and a little squishy.
Something for everyone!
Do you have any special memories attached to special recipes?
Today I have a guest post from Melanie from Country Roads! Melanie has been such a sweet blog friend over the couple years that I've known her, and I love reading her thoughts about her faith, family, crafts, and everything else she writes about. I'm happy to have her as a guest for me today as she tells us about some of the things she has learned since becoming a mom! And be sure to swing by her blog and say hello!
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Hello! I'm Melanie from Country Roads and I'll be guest posting for Callie today! I thought I'd tell you my adventures in 'mommyhood' and what I've learned since becoming a first time mom a little over 16 months ago!
Has it really been that long?
Time really does fly. I mean really. I remember in the first two weeks after bringing my baby girl Makayla home from the hospital after a scheduled c-section thinking how she'd be this little for a while. Next thing I know..she's awake more..grows out of her newborn diapers (and sizes 1, 2, and 3 in what seemed like a flash!)..grows out of her 'baby' clothes...is sleeping in a crib verses her bassinet..learns to sit..stand..crawl..feed herself...walk...and so on. It all happens so incredibly fast.
One thing I've learned is to enjoy each phase.
They go from being a newborn to a baby to a toddler really quick. Its not a bad thing, per say. Its rather something to rejoice about. Watching your child grow and learn how to do things on their own is so rewarding. I remember wanting her so badly to learn how to put her pacifier in her mouth without us having to do it everytime she'd lose it..especially when she was in her carseat. I'd think to myself, "I just wish she'd learn to hang on to that thing!"..of course now that is a total non-issue! They grow out of each phase before you know it..so learn to love where your at with your little ones (and take alot of pictures!)!
Has it really been that long?
Time really does fly. I mean really. I remember in the first two weeks after bringing my baby girl Makayla home from the hospital after a scheduled c-section thinking how she'd be this little for a while. Next thing I know..she's awake more..grows out of her newborn diapers (and sizes 1, 2, and 3 in what seemed like a flash!)..grows out of her 'baby' clothes...is sleeping in a crib verses her bassinet..learns to sit..stand..crawl..feed herself...walk...and so on. It all happens so incredibly fast.
One thing I've learned is to enjoy each phase.
They go from being a newborn to a baby to a toddler really quick. Its not a bad thing, per say. Its rather something to rejoice about. Watching your child grow and learn how to do things on their own is so rewarding. I remember wanting her so badly to learn how to put her pacifier in her mouth without us having to do it everytime she'd lose it..especially when she was in her carseat. I'd think to myself, "I just wish she'd learn to hang on to that thing!"..of course now that is a total non-issue! They grow out of each phase before you know it..so learn to love where your at with your little ones (and take alot of pictures!)!
Something else I have learned is I now have a deeper respect for parents.
Being a parent isn't easy. It can be challenging at times for different reasons. Whether its being up all night with a fussy baby and so tired you can't see straight or trying to disipline a toddler who is testing your sanity..parents go through alot. Of course, it has it rewards (hello sweet baby kisses and tight hugs!)..but I respect parents now more than ever because I am one. I see what challenges each one faces and the fears they have with supporting a family.
Its also important to listen to your inner heart.
When you become a mom for the first time especially..you'll have everyone from all around trying to tell you how to raise your child..whats best for them..what to do (and especially NOT to do!)..and basically give you input whether you've asked for their advice or not. It can get FRUSTRATING!! I've been there..done that and I've found it also tests just how humble of a person you are! God gave us all a 'mothering instinct', I believe, and it does kick in. If you are anything like me..I never grew up around many babies and when I was about to become a mom I had alot of doubts if I'd know what to do in certain situations. But you know..that inner instinct in my heart kicked in. So don't worry about what everyone else tells you!
Getting used to having a messy (or messier!) house was something new for me to get used to as well.
I was always the type to keep my house looking good. Very little clutter, dusted and vacuumed daily, everything in its place. With a toddler who gets into everything (and if your little one isn't at that stage yet..don't worry..they will be soon enough!) and makes messes faster than you can clean it up...I've learned its ok to let the house get a little messy. They are only children once and a little clutter and dust never hurt anyone! I'd rather have good memories 20 years down the line of playing with my little girl..making a mess in the kitchen baking and getting flour everywhere..than remembering how clean my house was.
Make a memory daily might be hard to do..but time has a way of getting away from us.
Whether its taking a walk, playing house, fingerpainting, crafting, reading, or visiting relatives..make memories daily with your kids. Time goes by so quickly to not take advantage of each day God has given us. Again..I'd rather look back in 20 years and remember all the fun stuff I did with my daughter than wishing we'd done more together.
And last but not least..making time for yourself is probably one of the most important things I've learned since becoming a mother.
Caring for a child whether its a newborn or a toddler is hard work. They require alot of time and patience and at the end of the day its easy to just plop into bed without a second thought. But its important to spend time taking care of yourself also. Spend time in devotion, read a good book (I highly recommend the Chicken Soup for the Souls books!), watch a movie, BLOG!, go out with friends, or spend the evening painting your toenails! Anything where the focus is on you is the key. If you don't take care of you first, you won't be able to be the best mother you can be.
I hope you've enjoyed reading my experiences and things I have learned since earning the title of "Mommy"! Its something that I wouldn't trade for the world and something I never knew I'd love so much. Yes, my world has been turned upside down.
But I love it. :-D
Today's post is on a topic that I think is so important for those of us with kiddos - making sure not to neglect the relationship with our husbands! After you have a baby (or two or three), I think it's so easy to let the kids and their needs become the center of everything, and I'm a strong believer that the husband/wife relationship should be a top priority - without that, everything falls apart.
So when my blog friend, Julie, suggested writing on this topic for a guest post, I was so excited! Julie and I have been blogging buddies for a long time, and I enjoy reading everything she has to say on her blog, Back To The Basics - be sure to stop by and say hello to her after you read her tips below!
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Hi! My name is Julie and you can find me over at my blog Back to the Basics, where I blog about my life as a wife and stay at home mom to Brayden (3) and Kenley (1). I am honored to guest post for Callie today!
2 kids under the age of 3 is a LOT- let me tell you, but it is NOT impossible by any means! My stance is that you will have difficulties no matter HOW far apart your kids are- you are still caring for human beings! Right? But as you are taking care of your children, there is also another person you may be putting on the bottom of your priority list-- your spouse.
Date nights around here are few and far between. It's tough to get the kids' schedules and our schedules to work at the same time PLUS a babysitter. But honestly, we COULD do better. We all could, right? Here are some ways I have found to better stay in tune with my spouse, even when a date night isn't on the schedule...
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Note: I'm off on vacation through Monday, so I've lined up some guest posts while I"m gone - thank you to Kate, Paula, Julie, and Melanie for giving me a much-needed break!
So when my blog friend, Julie, suggested writing on this topic for a guest post, I was so excited! Julie and I have been blogging buddies for a long time, and I enjoy reading everything she has to say on her blog, Back To The Basics - be sure to stop by and say hello to her after you read her tips below!
---------------------------------
Hi! My name is Julie and you can find me over at my blog Back to the Basics, where I blog about my life as a wife and stay at home mom to Brayden (3) and Kenley (1). I am honored to guest post for Callie today!
2 kids under the age of 3 is a LOT- let me tell you, but it is NOT impossible by any means! My stance is that you will have difficulties no matter HOW far apart your kids are- you are still caring for human beings! Right? But as you are taking care of your children, there is also another person you may be putting on the bottom of your priority list-- your spouse.
Date nights around here are few and far between. It's tough to get the kids' schedules and our schedules to work at the same time PLUS a babysitter. But honestly, we COULD do better. We all could, right? Here are some ways I have found to better stay in tune with my spouse, even when a date night isn't on the schedule...
- Spend time talking at the beginning or end of the day. Brandon usually leaves by 6am, so if we want to chit chat about our day, evenings after the kids go to bed is our best bet. Talking in bed before falling asleep helps us stay on the same page, talk about our plans for the next day, and some of our BEST conversations about life are usually at this time!
- Make the best of plans gone awry. One rainy day several weeks ago, I had lined up a sitter for the kids but my other plans fell through. I called Brandon to see if he wanted to go do some house shopping/returns at Menards, and we ended up on a small, spur of the moment date day! We went out for lunch, picked out new kitchen flooring, had Starbucks, and were home by dinner to get the kids. Sometimes, it's worth just trying to do SOMETHING on a whim.
- Take an interest in their interests. My hubby is a farmer, something I have known since the moment I laid eyes on him, but don't let that fool you- I am no expert. There is a LOT to it, more than I ever dreamed! But--it is SO important that I take his interests seriously. It helps us stay on the same page with our goals and dreams, lets him get excited about things he wants to take on, and most importantly, it brings us closer. Same with my photography interests-- there isn't a LOT that Brandon understands, but just the fact that he is willing to try? Makes a huge difference.
No one is perfect, and these transitions and changes are hard-- but I hope these tips will help soften the blow of them! Thanks for reading!
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Note: I'm off on vacation through Monday, so I've lined up some guest posts while I"m gone - thank you to Kate, Paula, Julie, and Melanie for giving me a much-needed break!
I'm excited to share today's guest post, because it's on a topic that is really important for me right now - making that transition from a family of three to a family of four! I found Paula's blog, Hopeful Future, through a link-up, and I'm so glad I did - she has so many good things to say on her blog, and I was so happy when she said she's like to write a guest post for me on this topic! I think she has some really great tips to share, so read on and be sure to stop by her blog and say hello!
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Hi! I'm Paula a bloggy friend of Callie's! My family just made the transition from "family of 3" to "family of 4" so I'm here today to share a few tips and tricks we have learned along the way. My son "Little Man" was around 21 months old when his baby sister was born. We did as much as we could to prepare him for the big change before she got here (click here to read Paula's post about preparing her son for Baby #2), and I'm really glad we did, but it was still a big transition for the little guy so I wanted to share a few ideas that might help any one else about to make the "big transition".
1. Expect your toddler to regress back into some old habits that you thought were long gone - This is normal and natural. We had gotten past tantrums for the most part before the baby came, but after she was here a week or two he was right back at it again throwing fits! I had heard from many other mamas that this is to be expected so I was ready for it, which it much less stressful when it happened!
2. Stay consistent - As he's regressing or acting out remember that everything in the toddler's world has just changed, that can be scary for him and he will test boundaries both for attention and to see if the boundaries are still there. Stay calm and stay consistent. I tried my best to handle each outburst the exact same way I would have handled it in the past. This helped him realize that some things (like rules) are staying the same. It is MUCH harder to be consistent while tending to the needs of a newborn, but toughing it out, especially the first week, will help in the long run. There were times that I would stand next to him in time out (so he wouldn't run away) while nursing the newborn. Other times I would have to put her down in the middle of a feeding in order to address something with my son. It was tedious and felt never ending, but if you are consistent, that time period passes fairly quickly. The first week or two he would try something every time I sat down to nurse. But eventually he realized that even though my hands were full, he would still have consequences for his actions. Lesson learned, and now he only 'tries it' sometimes ;)
3.One on One time - This seems like a no-brainer but it is hard to remember to do it! I try every day to spend some time with JUST my toddler. I will put the baby in her swing in another room and focus entirely on my son. Even just 10 or 15 minutes like this do wonders for his behavior. Most of the time when he is really acting out, I realize that it's because haven't given him and 1 on 1 time yet that day and he is craving attention! I try to fix that as soon as I can (without him thinking that he gets 1 on 1 time if he's naughty!)
Something I have been doing lately that works really well for us is preparing the baby for the day before I get my son up. that way his first few moments awake and out of his room are 1 on 1 mama/son time just like it used to be. Even if we just play for 10 minutes together at the start of the day it seems to start out day out a bit happier. Even if he had to wait in his room for a bit while I got his sister nursed and diaper changed etc.
4. Try to involve the toddler in what you are doing - My son loves "helping" with his sister. bringing her pacifier or stuffed animal when she's crying etc.
Oftentimes when I'm nursing the baby I ask him to bring me a book and we will read a story together on the couch so he's not excluded. He ends up declining half the time, but he knows I'm not pushing him away ;)
5. Don't get mad when the toddler's "help" is not helpful - I can't tell you how many times my son has decided to "help" by attempting to shove a pacifier in the peacefully sleeping baby's mouth, decided to "share" something heavy with her by putting it on her little lap etc. etc. sigh. Very hard not to respond angrily, but I don't want my son to be afraid to interact with his sister, so I try hard to just steer the help in another direction, being sure to thank him for his attempted help even as I'm telling him not to do it again! I know his heart is in the right place, though it is hard to keep that in mind sometimes. Example: He likes trying to brush her hair, but that's not a great activity for him so instead of just telling him to stop touching her head I do that and then suggest that he tickle her feet, and show him how fun that can be. It makes interacting with baby safe and fun! instead of something he can get in trouble for. (he does get in trouble when he is intentionally hitting her etc. but not when he's trying to help and just doesn't know how to properly)
6. Let your toddler still be a baby - My son still loves it when I call him my baby. Every time he gets out of the tub he asks to be swaddled in a towel and rocked like a baby. Every. Single. Time. I don't take that from him because he will always be my baby, and I don't want him to think that the new baby has replaced him in any way. He may not put be able to put it into words, but when he holds his arms up to me and asks to be the "baby" I feel that's his little heart asking if I still love him just as much as I used to, he wants to be sure that my love hasn't changed. I call him "big boy" and my "little man" too, he's growing up fast but I didn't force him to be called a big boy 24/7 just because there is a new baby around.
7. Be ready for melt downs - It amazes me how often they have synchronized melt downs. In fact, if you come by my house at 5pm most days you will be able to witness it! My only advice would be to make sure you are mentally and emotionally prepared for this (it can be a tad draining)! Remember that kiddos fussing doesn't mean you are a bad mama! We have all been there (or we will be at some point). try to remain as calm as you can and deal with whoever's need is more urgent, or most easily fixed. Example: baby girl is screaming because she's hungry, and Little Man wants me to cut up an apple for him. I will usually get the apple first because then he will be calm while I feed his sister (The longer task)... sometimes there are no easy fixes and that's one of those nights when you count the minutes til daddy comes home to help! Don't worry not every day is like that! (sidenote: I always try to text my hubby and warn him if we're having one of those days, so he comes in prepared to help out!)
8. Invest in a sling or carrier for the baby - I'm using my ERGO baby carrier way more this time around! I use it at the park so I can chase after my son if need be. I use it when we go grocery shopping because I can't fit both of them in the cart until she is sitting up I use it on walks when I don't want to get the huge double stroller out etc. I didn't think a carrier would be as essential to my life as my ERGO has become. I wore it maybe a dozen times with my son, never really liked it. Now, I wear it multiple times a week. If you don't have one, register for one asap! ;)
Growing to a family of four has, overall, been easier than I was expecting! The main difference is that I am more confident as a mother. I'm not paranoid and stressed all the time, and that has made a HUGE difference. The second thing that makes it easier is that my husband and I have been through it together once already, we know the stresses a new baby put on marriage, and we know how to communicate our needs to each other, and to be patient with one another as we go through the exhausting newborn stage again. We also know how intentional we have to be about spending husband and wife time together talking or playing board games etc. AND giving each other a couple kid-free hours every week. These changes have made all the difference in the world!
It is hard, and stressful, but it is wonderful and amazing too! :) I love having two kids, "easy" is no longer a word in my vocabulary, because EVERYTHING takes more time, effort and planning now, but it's so worth it.
I know there is no one size fits all for every family, so these are just a few tips and ideas that helped our transition from 1 baby to 2 go as smooth as possible. I hope some of them help you too!
<3 paula
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